Sometimes Getting Aggressive is in Your Best Interest!
While the old adage, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar.” is usually true, there are times in life when being sweet about a situation just won’t cut it. At these times, timidity or tenderness fail and empathy falls short. Whether you’ve been screwed over by someone special or overcharged by an online retailer, there are instances when rectifying a wrong entails getting aggressive—in the most productive way possible, of course. Unfortunately, being aggressive doesn’t always come naturally for everyone. So, if you’re among the throngs who sometimes struggle to speak up for themselves, read on… Herein lies tips for those times when getting your needs met requires a pedal-to-the-metal mentality and an aggressive approach!
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Aggressive vs. Angry
Okay, so you’re angry. And you have a right to be. But no one likes a hot head—and they certainly won’t listen to one. Furthermore, being aggressive doesn’t have to mean acting out of anger or excess emotion! In fact, focused calm will render far greater results than an onslaught of insults or vitriol. So, before you do anything, take a deep breath and channel your frustration in a positive manner. Try to expunge some of the emotional buildup before dealing with the situation.
Properly Address the Situation
Now that you’re calm, you can take some time to properly address the situation. What went wrong? What could’ve been done differently, and most importantly, what are you asking be done as a result of the error? Whether it’s a refund, an apology or attention to a matter that’s been inappropriately handled, you’d be well served to map out what you’re going to say about the situation, what you’re going to ask for in return and how you’re going to approach it all before you confront the other party. This will help you to stay calm if they anger you.
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Know What You’ll Accept as a Compromise
Your plan should include not just your desired result, but also where you’ll draw the line in a compromise. Negotiations often go awry because one party feels desperate and wants to grab onto something—anything—rather than be left with nothing. Not a pleasant situation and certainly not productive. By giving yourself a guideline, you’ll prevent spur-of-the-moment mistakes. Knowing your absolute bottom line (the minimum you can accept and still walk away satisfied), gives you guns to stick to and ensures you won’t walk away feeling bamboozled or disappointed.
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Respected is More Important Than Liked
Sometimes, what stops us from asking for what is rightfully ours is the fact that we don’t feel worthy of it. We’re afraid to be bothersome or make someone angry. God forbid anyone dislike us! As a result, we come off as pushovers and get treated as such. The result is that our needs are never met and we harbor resentment or sadness about it. No more. By taking on a stronger—healthier—persona when approaching difficult situations, you may or may not make friends, but you’ll earn respect and be treated accordingly.
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