Placating the Self-Obsessed With Gifts
If you’re in any type of relationship with a narcissist, it’s probably because you have no choice. Relationships with narcissists are generally unhealthy, because overly self-loving people are never satisfied. You can give and give and give, and they will still find fault with you or the relationship. Since many people choose not to be romantically involved with self-absorbed individuals, it’s most likely that the narcissist in your life is a family member, co-worker, or neighbor. In other words, someone you can’t avoid. You might not even like this person, but your situation dictates that you must be civil to him or her.
Narcissists like to think that they don’t need anyone or anything. Their only need in life is to be viewed as being important in the eyes of others. So lavish them with impractical gifts. If you give them something that you think is useful, they will criticize you and/or the gift for insulting them. Their ego is far too inflated to realize that you meant well.
By nature, narcissists are emotionally shallow. If you give them a gift that conjures feelings of nostalgia, intimacy, or self-reflection, they will push you and the gift away. It’s safest for you to stick with gag gifts so that your narcissistic acquaintance won’t be reminded of his or her vulnerability.
Don’t bother giving a narcissist any sort of gift that might suggest reciprocity. For example, if you give a narcissist a gift certificate to a restaurant, he or she will assume that means you are fishing for an invitation to go out with him or her. Narcissists can be paranoid, so try not to raise any suspicions — however unfounded they might be — with your gift giving.
If you’re still not sure how to handle your relationship with a narcissist during the holiday season, call one of our psychics for advice.
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