Love Your Body

Finding love is an accomplishment no matter who you are. But how much does weight affect our ability to find love?

The Cold, Hard Facts

Weight is a big topic these days. Statistics tell us that weight is becoming a serious crisis in America, with well over 50 percent of the population being moderate to severely overweight. We know that this affects our longevity and lifestyle, but research also suggests it might drastically affect our love lives as well, especially for women.

“Basically, we’re finding that you are what you weigh and you weigh what you are,” says Jeffery Sobal, a Cornell University Associate Professor of Nutritional Sciences. “Body weight is largely a reflection of one’s culture, [socioeconomic and] marital status, life stage, and ethnicity.” Early Cornell studies looked at the opinions of 786 high school students, finding that boys were the most intolerant of overweight girls. However, the girls were most hard on themselves, demanding ideal body types far beyond the expectations of boys.

Cornell University then looked at university students, finding that most eating afflictions (bulimia, anorexia, etc.) brought on the same negative connotation as being overweight. Specifically, 53 percent of men were turned off by anorexia, as compared to the 74 percent who were turned off by obesity. For the women, 59 percent would avoid dating a guy with anorexia, while 60 percent would avoid him if he was obese.

What this says to some researchers is that we may not only be brainwashed by stick figure magazine ads and models, but also be following the course of natural selection. In other words, dating anorexic/obese individuals actually increases the chance of potential hardships in a relationship, such as a short life expectancy, low quality lifestyle, high medical bills, low wages, and obese children. So it’s only natural that we’d choose to avoid this.

Divine (Weightless) Inspiration

The human spirit is neither body nor mass, but a radiant beauty that comes from within. With that said, much of how people are perceived is by their inner spirit. This is likely why some people believe their dating difficulties have to do with their appearance, when in fact it has more to do with their poor perception of themselves.

Our ability to find love has a lot to do with loving ourselves. If you honor and love who you are, studies show that others bask in your positive outlook and confidence, and enjoy being around you. Exercising and losing weight should be something you do for yourself out of love for yourself, and not something to impress somebody else.

We only find a couple true friends (and hopefully one soulmate) in a lifetime, and these are the people who will look past the vehicle of our soul. Some people drive a Ferrari, while others find themselves in a Volkswagen bus, but it shouldn’t really matter as long as it gets you where you’re going. Ask yourself, is it your body that’s weighing your love life down, or that chip on your shoulder?

Here’s some advice on gaining confidence in your soul-mobile:

Fake it until you make it. Pretend to love yourself (and your body) if at first you can’t do it in practice. Sometimes we have to trick our mind into doing what’s right. The mind is a powerful tool when used right!

Fall in love with yourself. When was the last time you stood in front of the mirror naked, and complimented (rather than punished) yourself? Becoming comfortable in your own shell means accepting every part of yourself. Your desire to lose weight should not be the result of a lack of loving yourself the way you are, but rather loving yourself enough to take better care.

Relax, it’s time to have fun. Resist the urge to be self destructive and critical of your body. It is this evil voice that is the root cause of many people’s unhappiness. Kick him or her to the curb, and don’t let them come back!

What are your favorite ways to begin accepting yourself?

3 thoughts on “Love Your Body

  1. Pingback: Psychic Workout: Feel Your Body | California Psychics Blog

  2. Jai Krishna Ponnappan

    Hello Eric,
    Thanks for another useful and insightful post. I agree with many of the facts you mentioned…”Body weight is largely a reflection of one’s culture, [socioeconomic and] marital status, life stage, and ethnicity.”, not to forget lifestyle, diet, breathing and the metabolism that goes with it. There’s a form of yoga called Pranayama or Yogic Breathing which emphasizes the regulation of breath to ‘control the Life force’ or ‘breathe of Life’ . Practitioners and instructors of yoga do guide on breathing while exercising but it’s a vital art that can really transform both the body and the spiritual core within the soul. The way we inhale and exhale both the depth and the frequency dictate how many calories we manage to burn and our energy levels. Through control and practice it’s possible to manipulate and regulate this depending on our daily needs. People develop bad habits or restrained breathing patterns and this coupled with the wrong diet, bad food groups and a sedentary lifestyle can lead to being over weight, unhealthy and eventually a state of mind and self awareness that goes with this image. Your right in saying you can start with your mind and work backwards to being a healthy soul in a healthy body. Many people have successfully done this and transformed themselves with a positive mental outlook, a healthier life style, good habits and a new attitude that have long lasting and sustained results.

    And yes,
    “We only find a couple true friends (and hopefully one soulmate) in a lifetime, and these are the people who will look past the vehicle of our soul. Some people drive a Ferrari, while others find themselves in a Volkswagen bus, but it shouldn’t really matter as long as it gets you where you’re going. Ask yourself, is it your body that’s weighing your love life down, or that chip on your shoulder?

    This vehicle for the soul that you speak of gives us an opportunity to make a spiritual progression. If we take care of it like the gift that it was meant to be and not abuse it, the window for achieving these spiritual goals will stay open and life will surely come knocking on your door with its many processes. The truth is intangible and has both spiritual qualities and governs all things material including our bodies. Realizing it allows us to look above and beyond the bounds of our five senses, mind, intelligence and spirit to higher things such as LOVE and PEACE that are more worthy of our energy and efforts.

    Perfection is not a necessity its a driving force that leads us to these higher truths. What might be the right levels of perfection varies from person to person based on their individual and unique purpose or goals in life. So again you’re spot on when you say,

    Fake it until you make it.

    Fall in love with yourself.

    Relax, it’s time to have fun.

    Thin, slim, medium, hefty or fat, we’re only human and we all make mistakes cause the true prize is in the lessons we learn. I’m in love with the lessons and its many teachers esp. my soul mate ;) So Life truly is one long joyride when we find that elusive balance within ourselves and start living this adventure to the fullest.

    P.S – Great Blog entries Eric.

    Love, Blessings & Peace to Y’all.
    Have a wonderful week.
    -Jai :)

    Reply
  3. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi,
    Great article……forget those silly magazines…..it’s about feeling healthy, and usually when you feel healthy and full of energy, you look healthy.

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *