Imagine a life without fear. Everything is perfect and safe. There are no risks, and no worries. What would you do with the rest of your life? Any ideas?
People often say, “I would travel,” or “I would help others.” Mostly though, people admit they just don’t know what they’d do. Happiness and peace seem so far away, and most of us never even consider what that level of contentment might look like. Most of us have too strong an identification with our story and our pain–and it is so strong, so all-encompassing, that it never even crosses our minds that we might be able to live another way. But it’s important to remember that thought always precedes action. So how can we truly embrace our happiness, if we cannot see through our filters–those lenses of pain?
When we focus our attention on one object–whether it be a person, a place, or a thing–we are externalizing our happiness, placing the responsibility outside ourselves. This creates a lifelong habit of living in reaction. We are like corks on an ocean of experience and emotion: tossed around endlessly until we are so weary of fruitless endeavor and wasted time that we sometimes feel like giving up. In desperation, we become prey to anyone or anything that promises to ameliorate that unending pain.
The truth is that no one will ever take better care of you than you demand, and no one will take better care of you than you take care of yourself. You set the standard, and others will only take you as seriously as you take yourself.
Furthermore, there is no one out there who is willing to sign on to play “parent” to someone else’s “wounded child” for very long–and we all carry a wounded child within us. Many–if not most–of our relationship conflicts revolve around those childlike responses to adult situations. Ultimately, it is our own responsibility to send that small child away. We must fill that empty place within our own hearts; we must fill it with ourselves.
The heart is considered to be the nexus of our energetic systems–there are three Chakras below it, and three above. From this position–if one can stay there–everything becomes possible. But remember: the Chakra just below the heart is connected to the adrenal glands, and has a Martian connection. In Greek mythology Aries’ chariot was drawn by two horses named Deimos and Phobos, which translate into “fear” and “panic.” This is why the idea persists that “one is either loving or fearing,” and yes: they are mutually exclusive. Love or fear–choose one.
Consider now whether you carry fear around with you, or love. If you answer “both,” what you are calling love is something else, and it is for you to discover precisely what that truly is. This requires a small jump in perspective to get to your heart, but it cannot be accomplished from behind a wall of fear. The reason the heart Chakra is always connected with health is that all healing begins with love, which in turn begins with a love of self. Love of self is the real heart of the matter. Be there now, because there is no other way. Time is precious, and that is a very real consideration. Wouldn’t you agree?
Are you living in love, or in fear? Does love always crowd fear out of your heart?–what do you think?