I just wasted over 10 years of my life being out of shape. I think the last time I worked out was in my mid to late 20s and I always had a really good reason to not go back to it. I felt that the stories about your metabolism slowing down when you got older were just scare tactics from the “health nuts with an agenda.” Then I turned 30 and yes, my metabolism slowed down. But there still wasn’t a whole lot of reason to be worried. I gained weight fast, but I lost it equally as fast, most of the time. Plus, I worked out my brain! I read tons of books, learned about different philosophies, sciences and studies — I started having an actual career vs. just a job and soon, I no longer paid any attention to my body at all. On top of it, I started smoking.
I turned 40 and noticed that I had gained more weight than I cared to acknowledge. My metabolism had slowed down to a crawl! There was no denying it anymore — I was devastated to notice I needed to buy clothes in a size 14. I always had my personal “maximum density” rule, and was horrified when I saw my wedding pictures. My face, the one thing I had always liked, looked bloated and fat. So did my arms. I didn’t feel all that great either — I had no energy, I was often annoyed for no apparent reason, my shoulders and neck started bugging me, and so did my back and hips. I felt completely unattractive.
My entire life I had decided that my body was just a stupid vessel I hated, and therefore deserved the least amount of attention. When I hit 40 and finally found my happiness I was done with these idiotic thoughts. I made a decision to be healthy and to look good. I started hypnosis for weight loss and signed up with a personal trainer. I started working out and followed his instructions to a T. Whatever he said, I did. I didn’t fight him, I didn’t argue, whine or complain — I just did it. This was incredibly hard. After 3 1/2 months of hard training I had lost about 15 pounds and two sizes but what amazed me is how I felt in my head!
I have learned that in order to be the best I can be, my body needs to be in shape. I have learned that physical health also equals mental and emotional health. The mind is truly a powerful thing and I know my mind shapes my body — whatever I conjure up in my mind somehow gets matched by reality. I have an active image that I hold in my mind while training and find that my body works hard to match this image. I never believed that a great body is required to be successful. I was wrong! It requires physical health and well-being to achieve balance for the full package. When I am done with my work out, I feel euphoric, happy, content and bubbly. Working out and slowly crawling towards a healthy body has added so much to my spirits that I finally understand, there is no way to be truly powerful, if we keep telling ourselves, “I can’t”.
I am proud of myself because I am finally taking care of business. I am doing the work and there is a lot of power in knowing that. I regret that I wasted my 30’s sitting on my butt, making excuses, but I started doing something about it now and that’s what counts!