Red Responds: Is the Relationship Over?

Your Relationship: What are They Trying to Say?

Denise from Dorchester asks:

If my boyfriend tells me he needs space because the connection is not there, does this means he’s trying to tell me in a nice way that the relationship is over?

Psychic Red ext. 9226 Responds:

Dear Denise,

I hate to say this, but your boyfriend is being honest with you. Try to appreciate that he does care a lot about you, and really doesn’t want to hurt you or be cruel. But for a while now he has been struggling with feeling more than a bit smothered by the confines of the relationship.

Please don’t think you did anything wrong, because you didn’t. It’s not as if there was an event or specific aspect that has caused this; it’s just been building up over time. Your boyfriend is, and has been, struggling with his own emotions and his place in life.

While painful, the best thing you can do is let him go.

This man does love you, but the relationship itself has fallen into a place of habit and routine. That, on top of his personal turmoil, has led him to feel trapped and unable to really sort through and get back to the high feeling of being “in love.” So, give him the space and time he needs.

There is a very good chance that when he finds his personal clarity once again, he is going to find his way back to you. But, I’m not suggesting you put your life in suspension and wait for him. You’re going to hurt for a while, but you will also be free to go on living, so LIVE. Some distance between the two of you is also going to benefit you.

While this relationship is certainly headed for a separation or a break, it isn’t necessarily the final chapter between the two of you. But, it is much better to risk a true ending and reunite with happiness, than to try and avoid a severance and eventually part forever. Those are pretty much the two paths that present for you and your boyfriend at this time.

For a while, the two of you were lost in each other. Then life and the relationship settled into something a bit more routine. Sometimes, the safety of love and a committed relationship can douse the flames of desire and passion and that has happened between the two of you. So give him his space, let go of the safety net and things will look very positive for a reunion, when the both of you are strong and independent once again.

If it helps, don’t look at this as a loss or an ending. Look at this as a time to rediscover and be true to yourself, as your boyfriend will be doing the same. And, as each of you grows stronger again as individuals, you will have the opportunity to reunite and reconstruct your relationship in order to get it back to what it started out as. You’ll have the chance to begin again, and the knowledge to avoid the stresses and missteps of the past.

Denise, everyone wants the love that’s going to last forever. You are in a painful-but-good position, because you have the opportunity to decide whether your forever is going to be heavenly and bound by love, or hellish and bound by promises made in the past.

Believe what this man is telling you and respect him and his words. Some risks are worth taking because they do bring about the biggest rewards.

I’m sorry you have to go through this, but it really is for the best—not just for him, but also for you.

I wish you the best.

Brightest Blessings,


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28 thoughts on “Red Responds: Is the Relationship Over?

  1. clarita

    hello , can you pls tell me about my lovelife. and can i ask you a question. i want only to know if my former boyfriend is still in loved with me and is there a chance that we will be together again. and is there another woman in his life now, can u help me to know these questions of mine, thank you so much.

  2. Linda

    I was suppose to be engaged for the last two years. He could never seem to get himself together financially. He lives on the East Coast and I live on the West. I have been going there every six months since we’ve been together. I had been getting calls from friends there telling me about him and another woman. He denied of course, until two weeks before I was to go there, then he says that they are friends and she loans him money and helps him out.i had noticed that his pattern changed. When I got there he was homeless but didn’t tell me. He usually stay with me while I am there. He did for a week while she was out of town, when she came back I saw less and less of him. I was coming home so he had to leave where I was staying and told me that he had to take time to get his self together. He never came straight out and said that we were over. He doesn’t call me anymore but when i call him he is always in a hurry. Is this to keep me hanging on until he makes up his mind or is he not man enough to be honest.

  3. George

    Hello, Red! At the end of September my girlfriend broke up with me after 11 months. I thought we were soul mates and I believed I transformed her life with travel, fitness and nutrition.

    She has a problem with trust and jealousy as a result of her 1st marriage. I believe I got too close and she called it off now instead of possibly getting hurt later. I have tried to reach out to her but have been met with ambivalence. This has been going on for about 3 months now.

    We had a very strong physical and emotional connection unlike any she had ever had before and I know she still cares deeply. She even use to call me husband. But the relationship did experience cultural and communication problems. What is the possibility of this relationship reuniting? Thanks!


  4. Lake Girl

    My boyfriend of two years was to call when he returned from a trip………no call……I am giving him his space, if he does not call in the next week or so, I am going to move on. This is an educated man, and I consider his actions immature and inconsiderate. Sometimes by consulting a phychic, they can help us understand some reasons why people act as they do.

    This space is for COMMENTS, from people regarding the topic at hand…..if you have a question for a psychic, you need to make an appt. to speak to one, they are not going to answer your questions here.

  5. Janice

    Hi Red,

    I was just wondering when I will ever have a relationship, because since my divorce I haven’t been having any luck in the dating department. There is also a guy named David that I felt really strong about if you could tell me his feelings about me? Thank you so much. My date of birth is 01/17/1985 and David’s is 12/29/1976.

  6. marie

    I am a Libra and my boyfriend is a gemini, he was just taken to the hospital, and I found out three woman is telling me they are either connected or his friend, his brother keep blaming me for different things that happened to him, I am not sure how to handle this. was he cheating, is he cheating . is my relationship over. has it been. wow. I see him only on the weekends. we have a long distance relationship; help

  7. rosecoccarr

    we have not been together in a long time..he has so much space and it for years…but maybe I is the best thing to let him go…he still stll chearts and always will…I do still care for him and he has woman watching him for rest of life..that is why I have to go..i am not any rush to meet a nother man….but my life has to go on….the right one will come ..I am happy..

  8. Marti

    Sharia, all Cancers do not behave the same way. I am with one who is not the most romantic of men, but I know he cares for me. Know that most of them are very nice people, actually, one of the nicest signs in the zodiac!

  9. Rose

    I need to know if my husband and i are going to get back together? We have been living apart because of some problems.

  10. Sharon b

    It hurts an painful that Ricky Patterson don’t want me he pretended but I do love him care deeply will he come back his birthdate is September 29 1967 mine October 3 1966

  11. Marc from the UK

    Message for Denise from Dorcheser……………… Be grateful that your boyfriend has not been horrible or treating you badly ( normally this is a sign of a weak troubled man!) It seems that maybe he needs time to miss you and reflect. I can relate to his situation, and yes I agree with Red that he needs time to reflect and have clarity. Under no circumstances wait longer than you have too, you have a right to be happy and enjoy life, sometimes carrying on and picking yourself up is a tonic that you both need. It is a bit like eating chocolate, you can over do it and lose the desire, however put it on a diet and suddenly you see the wood for the trees and it sparkles again!

    Good luck and embrace change, it helps the healing process, you have a right to be happy :}

  12. Nina

    I am in a similar situation to Denise. I have not heard from my boyfriend for 4 days when we usually communicate every day, even if it’s just a sweet goodnight text. I am trying to give him the space he’s asked for as we did move very fast together (at his urging). How long do I wait to get more definition with him? This is really bothering me!!

  13. judy

    Is steve still cheating. I can’t tell anymore. He said he stopped, but I have trust issue. What can you tell me about relationship? Is it time for a break?

  14. Candy

    My husband and I are going to divorce he want to divorce because of the 3rd party and he always cheat on me.. What shall I do on this should I give him our divorce or ill still keep it for the sake of our daughter?

  15. Cinthya

    I love my boyfriend, I used to feel the connection before…but not anymore, I feel like he lost his patient on me , even he tries so hard to show me his love for some reason I don’t feel it. I feel like he only does that because he has to. Not because he really loves me.. I asked him for a break but he doesn’t want to.. I don’t know what to do.. is like a pain in my heart that I have right now… I can’t live with it anymore.. help me please.

  16. Tenley

    I agree with Red ! Count your blessings, know that spirit will send someone to you who is connected and you will wonder “where was he all of this time “

  17. sharia

    lm married to a cancer man love him to death, but l don’t feel that love that they describe a cancer is supposed to be like, although he tells me all the time l wouldn’t be with you if i didn’t love you. help lm confused.

  18. Anat

    The man I dated asked me to take the STD tests. All tests came out negative but I found out I have antibodies of cold sores which I never had symptoms for. He told me he needs some time to rethink our relationship. I feel this is the end even though he did not say that. I am heartbroken about it. We never kissed and never had sex and we are together for about 2 months.
    Spiritually we were great together. We shared a lot of private life experiences and became very close, still without kissing and/or having sex. We did hold hands and hugged a lot. We both hoped this will take us to the next level. I am a widow, 53, he is a widower, 54. We are both nice, good, old fashion people. We are both well educated.
    Is this the end of our relationship? Will he be back? I am a Virgo and he is a Sagittarius.
    Why do I feel I am being punished for something I did not do? Was I just very naive to think he is my prince?
    Can you advice? Thank you.

  19. Cecilia

    I have alot of of conflicts going on right now, financially, relationship and hope not my family. Can you please give me an advice. Feeling confuse.


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