Cecilia in Lakeland writes:
I lost my husband a little over a year ago. We were separated at the time, but needless to say it was devastating to me and our son. My question is this – do you see someone in my future (soon) that will love me truly, but more importantly, love my son and help me teach him to be a strong, kind man?
I really wish I could tell you that your struggles and loneliness were over right now, but I am seeing that it is still going to take a bit of time before you connect with the right man. Not everyone who shows you kindness and attention is as good as they appear, so don’t be too eager to give away your trust.
There will be one brief relationship from now until the time you meet the man who will become a permanent part of your life and family. The guy you will choose to be with will be introduced to you, but casually, not in the manner of being fixed up or a blind date. He is tall, on the thinner side, with lighter hair and eyes. I think he is a teacher, but I am not 100% certain. If not a teacher directly, he does work in some capacity of a public school district. He is divorced, and has two children of his own that he adores but rarely sees, because of a distance issue with his ex-wife. He has a very calming energy that can’t help but make you feel safe.
This man will love you, and your son will grow to think of him as a father. While there will be the usual ups-and-downs that many blended families experience, I don’t see too challenging of an adjustment, possibly because this is a relationship that will evolve slowly. It looks as if you will be meeting him in April of next year, but marriage is about three years away.
Things are going to work out well for you, and your son will grow into the kind of man you hope he will be. He will be his mother’s son.
I am very sorry for your loss, for you as well as your boy. I hope this helps to put your mind at least a little bit at ease.