Will It Last Or Are There Damaging Secrets?
5. It may be a long-distance relationship, but if you’re looking at it as a viable one, then (after a safe, appropriate amount of time,) you should know the basics. Like his address, where he works, and a number or two of the people in his life in case of an emergency (which means, people in his life should know about you!)… just like an in-person relationship. If he’s vague about ANY of these things, then trust me, that’s only the beginning of his secrets.
4. If he disappears for days or weeks with no explanation, he’s hiding something. There is no excuse in this world that can keep him from sending a 30-second text, call, or email at SOME point during that time. I’m sorry, but there’s not.
3. WHY are you sending him money, if you’re not living with him? If he’s not man enough to pay for his own groceries, his own cell phone, and his own video games, how is he going to be man enough to be a good partner? He’s found a way to pay for these things before you were in the picture, why all of a sudden can’t he now? Is he working? We all know the job market is difficult now, but sitting on unemployment for 2 years, playing video games and watching movies, saying “poor me’’ with his hand out does not paint a hopeful picture for your future together, and you need to RUN!
2. You’ve taken time off work, paid for your ticket, paid for a hotel room, and he can’t take the time out of his schedule to pick you up from the airport, or see you more than an hour or two during your visit. If it’s your first visit, he should want to spend time with you to get to know you. If you’ve been in this relationship for a while, he should NEED to be with you as much as he is able, because he has missed you so much.
1. Before you move across the country, and give up your life, (and, by the way, why are YOU the one giving up your life to be with them?) be sure you’ve spent a good amount of quality time with them, IN PERSON! People can, and will, portray themselves much differently from a distance, and you cannot know the real person unless you spend time with them, in-person, to see how they handle everyday upsets, disappointments, and disagreements. Don’t wait until it’s too late, and you’re stuck alone in a strange city, with no support system.
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