Is a man who is secretive playing you? This is a big question especially when he makes promises and seems sincere. You may even help him when he asks. But when it comes down to it and the only thing that he’s around for is sex, you might just be getting played.
Is it for Real, Or Did You Just Get Played?
I met a man on holiday, and found an instant connection. He travelled back and forth for business and said he would move to my city. After several weeks he asked if I could pick up an airline ticket, and I did. When he was with me I paid for everything. He told me he was financially tapped out because of support and home obligations. He said he lived in the same house as his wife and kids… red flag, but he had no one around most of the time. The last weekend he spent with me I drove him back to the city, and we loved so completely in the morning. He said he loved me, and I would pick him up again on Thursday night. He went home unexpectedly on Tuesday, then wrote an e-mail saying that his kids needed him and that to keep their home and lifestyle up he could not come back. He said he loved me so much that when he was with me he was always happy, but he felt bad because of the kids (18, 22, 24 ). He won’t return my phone calls or e-mails. I just can’t believe this; it seemed like the real thing. Help.
I wish I could tell you that it was the real thing for him, but from what is sounds like, this guy is simply a con; and if you truly think about it, you knew absolutely nothing about him.
A man who keeps his life a complete secret and asks you for money for a ticket and everything else, is usually simply a fraud who is probably doing the same thing to other women as well. Usually, the stories they tell you are completely made up and there is no way for you to research any of it, because you don’t know where he is living and maybe not even what his full name is.
Honestly, I think this guy did you a favor. If he would have stuck around he would have probably just asked for more “help,” while giving nothing in return. Men like him usually do not have a conscious, so we will never be able to fully grasp their actions.
My advice to you, dear Angela, is to move on. Stop contacting him and do not respond/answer if he tries to contact you. There is something extremely fishy going on here and guys like him can cause severe emotional and financial damage. From his actions he has proven to you that he is dishonest, disloyal and manipulative. These are three most important reasons to not enter a relationship with anyone. Don’t dissect the feelings you had too much. Sometimes we fall for the wrong people because they are often so good at bringing out something that we have been missing, or they pretend to be what we need at the time—usually for their own gain.
I can guarantee that you will find someone who is not a two-timing jerk and he will have true intentions for a meaningful and honest relationship with you. And next time, do not ignore the red flags, especially when they are screaming at you, like they did this time.
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