Show Your Love, Don’t Text It

Communicating With a Loved One

Everyone has email. And, most of us text, tweet,  and use Facebook on our phones. Beeps have become a part of how we communicate. Beep beep “I want to c u 2nite.” Beep beep “r u free.” Beep beep “yes 888,” and so on. Do beeps make any of you feel really warm and fuzzy inside? If so, maybe you are the exception. But I am sure that intimacy cannot grow through this kind of communication.

Many times clients will call me and ask if he’s/she’s “the one.” And I will ask, “When was the last time you saw them?” It doesn’t take long before the client realizes through their guides that there is a difference between seeing their guy/gal and getting beeps. And the difference is huge.

In a new relationship, one can pretend that the beeps mean something for a while. But eventually, beeps will be recognized as an illusion of a relationship. And if this “relationship” doesn’t have face-to-face time, it begins to fade before it really has a chance to start. However, by not answering the beep, you force your potential mate to call you or see you if their true intent is to know you better. And if not, then you keep your power by being the one to not accept that empty form of communication. Then you can walk away with your power. If you “go along” with beeping each other, the feeling of emptiness and loneliness grows because the person never really forms an intimate bond with you.

The next time you meet a person of interest and they either text you for a date or text you to confirm the date, consider ignoring the text as a means of making them call you. Otherwise, you may find that beeping is the only way they communicate with you. If they really want to make a connection with you, they will call. Make them chase you and make calling you a habit for them.

Texting isn’t all bad. It’s good for letting someone know you’re running late. It’s also okay to use when you’re in a solid relationship, but it should never be a primary form of communication.  It’s also good for sexting! But real intimacy comes from face to face contact and hearing each other’s voices. You need to maintain your connection in these ways if you want your relationship to last.

After all, when was the last time you saw computers make love?

Lucy ext. 5353

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10 thoughts on “Show Your Love, Don’t Text It

  1. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext 9500

    Excellent article, Lucy !!!!! Good advice and well written !!!!!

    For those of you out there that have not had a reading with Lucy, I urge you to give her a try, you will not be disappointed !

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500


    This article is so true to read. If you want a true relationship there are such thing as the five senses in developing a relationship. It works for me. Texting can be so impersonalable at times.

  3. Patricia

    Excellent article. I coudln’t agree more and it has become an absolute epidemic operating a relationship this way… or shall I say ” the illusion of a relationship”!!! I was dating a younder man over the holidays (age 29) and i’m 10 years older. I found it increadibly maddening at the level in which this man text me without calls yet he was professing his “undying love”. It all became so annoying that he finally broke it off based on my constant and very justifiable complaints about the insincerity of his constant texting. When I speak to other women his age they aren’t the least bit phased about receiving texts over phone calls. In fact, one of them said it’s just normal and they see it no different the speaking to them. Really something!

  4. Jessica

    Dear Lucy,

    I have a cell phone for emergencies only; and I’ve never sent a text. I’ve been a new relationship for 9 months, and we’ve made it a point to never email each other. We use the phone to work out logistics for a date, and to connect if one or both of us has had a really long day, and we won’t be seeing each other until the next day.

    Other than, it’s all face-to-face, and it’s sooooo wonderful!!!
    We’re so connected and never run out of amazing conversations, not to mention how absolutely delightful it is to be in each others’ arms as much as we like…which is a lot.

    I’ve long been aware of how the quality and quantity of communication is a strong indicator of the reality of a situation with a man (or vice versa), but it took me years to love myself enough to go with intuition on that. I’m so glad I did, because it made it easy for me to keep my power, as you say, and walk away from a man who really wasn’t stepping up to the plate. It also prepared me to be ready and truly available when someone fabulous came along.

    Thanks for a great reminder!

  5. -quinn ext. 5484

    very timely article lucy, leaving the beep beep for the roadrunners…
    also if you think about it the beep beep sound is exactly like the car alarm when you lock it, very symbolic or like beep beep get out of the way…
    i like the ring ring… two on the finger, engagement and wedding.
    thank you for sharing this very important aspect of the dating realm.

  6. Marc from the UK

    I agree and dissagree in many ways texting is a safe way to feel your way in to a relationship, then you can show caution and be safer until you feel more confident. As someone on the dating scene on and off it is a necessary safe way to text, before giving away addresses and home contact details when you feel more confident about someone. All decent dating sites will advocate safety rules like this. HOWEVER in the old days people of the older generation learnt the skill of social interaction, and people skills, it was in a way better as it created the desire to see people and talk as we did not have the mod cons of a modern society so planned our dates with that feeling of excitement and the I can’t wait to see you syndrome! the mod cons of our society have in a way spoilt the desire to wait! as people are now so easily available.


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