Learn the Age-Old Art of Glamour!
It’s easy to say that the best way to succeed on a date is to have confidence in yourself, speak directly, let your personality shine, and blah-blah-blah. The truth is, in the real world, we don’t always feel that great about ourselves. Instead of canceling dates, waiting for a “good day” to come around, here are a few tricks to help you boost confidence, decrease doubt, and put your best foot forward no matter how bad of a hair day you’re having.
If a mirror is not your friend, most research would suggest that you are headed for trouble. It may seem obvious to avoid the things you don’t like about yourself, but what you end up doing is creating an even worse image of yourself in the process. A poor self-image, is easily picked up by other people, which means a first date will sense the fact that you don’t like yourself, and have a hard time liking you either. Instead, try this simple exercise. Stand in the mirror and look at yourself. Don’t focus on the weaknesses you may notice at first, but rather your strengths. See yourself from the standpoint that a friend or loved one would. Practice this exercise at least once a day, reminding yourself about the things you like most. By the end of the week, your internal image will be noticeably improved.
Confident people see themselves as a blessing to others. Self haters see themselves as ugly and disliked, bringing this imagery to life through the magic of their own will. Motivational speakers talk a lot about the power of will, and it’s true. If you believe that you are a beautiful person, others will see it too. The problem you may have, is finding a way to see that side of yourself, when you’ve been dragging your image through cow patties for the past couple years. Try this exercise. Close your eyes, and think back to the happiest you’ve ever been. Now take notice of the self-image you’ve created. This is the positive you. This is the person you should take with you when you go on a date. Now open your eyes, and maintain that image as you take your shower, comb your hair, shave, put on makeup, and drive to the place where your date is meeting you. Whenever you feel yourself start to slip back into the old image, excuse yourself, and reconnect with the positive you.
Some people’s imagination and imagery are a little more potent than others. With that in mind, another way to improve your self-image, is to place yourself into an outfit that makes you feel good about you. Your clothes can’t change who you are, but they certainly can change the way you feel about yourself. This is why you should take extra care when dressing for a date, to ensure that you are meeting your expectations of what a successful person looks like. You’ve probably seen the glow that comes after a woman has just gone through a $15,000 makeover on television. While those pearly veneers may make her smile brighter, and that wired bra may influence her “perkiness.” The real difference is in her renewed confidence. It doesn’t take a lot of money to build a better self-image. All it takes is finding one or two outfits that accentuate your inner style, allowing you to be the shining star you already know you are!
Many people choose to motivate themselves through their own achievements and failures. However, by focusing too much on what you want, the mind has a way of coming up with reasons why you shouldn’t be able to accomplish it. Overall, this can be self-defeating, and lead to a poor outlook on dating. A better way is to focus on the happiness of the people you are seeing. While you may not know exactly what they are looking for, I can tell you that they are probably looking for someone to appreciate them, listen to what they say, and care about what they think. In short, you’re focusing on being a blessing to them, rather than creating a blessing for yourself. It is so much easier to create happiness in others. Through this action, you will not only receive blessings in return, but create a positive goal to focus your efforts, rather than dwelling on the reasons you don’t deserve to be happy yourself.
Remember, successful dating is not just about loving yourself. You’ll never know your true potential for love, until you’ve discovered a partner who will teach you how to love as much as you deserve!
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