49 Things Every Man Loves

The Essentials Men Love

The things that appeal to men might seem pretty simple and generally revolve around those things that define men: sex, food, power and sports. There are a couple of rules I have put into place in order for this article to succeed. Rule number one, this list represents the majority of guys. No, not every guy likes these. Some guys like playing with Barbie. However, they are not in the majority. Rule number two, I realize that there are a lot of women who like these things, too. We don’t hold a contract on any of this stuff. It is still a free country, and if you happen to be one of those women who like these things, kindly leave your phone number (just kidding), as I’m sure a good portion of the single guys out there would like to get to know you!

1. The word, “Yes” – Men love approval, whether it is agreeing to a date or an evening of sex. Men are particularly susceptible, because they are the ones who do the majority of asking for stuff. Enjoy it ladies, because if the roles were reversed, studies show that you might not be as picky with whom you end up with.

2. Eating the last bite – Women are wonderful caretakers. This makes it hard for them to eat the last tidbit of many things. Men look forward to getting that last bite of cake, the last sip of orange juice, or the last squeeze of toothpaste.

3. Internet porn – Some surveys suggest that Internet porn may have been enjoyed (at one time or another) by darn near 100 percent of the current male population.

4. Orgasms – Men are obsessed with the orgasm, because they are spoiled by it. Men can orgasm with a casual stranger, life-long partner, or a wrinkled up section of a Sears underwear catalog. Women reach orgasm one-third as often as men during hookups and up to three-fourths as often as men when invested in a steady relationship.

“Much to my amazement, I have discovered that there are women who have never had the big O with another person or alone. Ladies, it is okay to have the big O and lots of them, for that matter.” – Psychic Quinn ext. 5484 

5. Sports

6. Video games – Studies suggest that a man’s brain completely shuts down in order to recuperate. Hence, video games are the perfect opportunity for this.

7. Owning a “Big Johnson” – In the U.S., breast reduction surgery may be the fifth most common plastic surgery. However, how many men do you think wished they could have a smaller manhood? About one percent, according to surveys.

8. Oral sex

9. Contraception – Nearly three-quarters of men would take a male birth control pill if it were available. However, once the side effects were released, I am willing to bet that percentage would take a nose dive.

10. One woman – Research suggests that most men would rather have one good woman then a harem in their bed every night. As it turns out, a couple of horny guys always skew these results, making the rest of us look like dogs.

11. Food – The cliche that men think about sex every seven seconds is not true. While they may indeed think about sex more often than women, they also think about other things proportionately more than women, such as food.

12. Sleep – Two of a man’s most fond activities in life are sleeping with a sex partner and just plain sleeping.

13. Threesomes – While guys may like one woman, many of them dream of sharing a bed with two (if for only one night).

14. His own chair – Remember as a kid, how mom would sometimes let you sit in her chair? Do you remember dad ever letting you do the same thing?

15. Women in commando – This isn’t about running around town without a lid on her yoni, but rather, in the privacy of your own home.

16. A woman who speaks her mind – She is preferred to a woman who expects him to read her mind.

17. A woman who makes the first move – Guys like a woman who knows what she wants. There is a lot of confusion here. Does a man turn down a woman because she was the one to ask him first? No, he turned her down because  he didn’t like her in the first place.

18. A woman who never says, “Nothing” – Men hate this answer, no matter what the context.

19. A woman who always says, “Fine”– This can be more to his detriment, as “fine” is often worse than the dreaded “nothing.”

“Trust cannot exist where there’s fear, and fear exists in the unknown future which you have no control over; live in the present moment.” – Psychic Rivers ext. 5273

20. More talk, less text (if he likes you) – Surveys show that boys, age 17, text 30 times a day; teen girl’s text 100 times a day. However, if you are a parent, your bill has probably already told you this.

21. Rights to the remote

22. Brunettes – Various surveys over the years seem to suggest that the majority of guys prefer brunettes to just about any other hair color.

23. Masturbation

24. Casual sex – In one study, 70 percent of men who were asked by a strange woman to have sex, agreed without any questions asked.

25. Cuddling – The Kinsey Institute claims that the majority of men also like cuddling.

26. Boobs – Researchers came to the conclusion that men really do like women’s breasts.

27. Being the alpha male – Men all love to flaunt their stuff and be the top dog.

28. Dry eyes – Studies suggest that sobbing in front of a man may work to your advantage, if you are either trying to lower his testosterone or put a major damper on his libido.

29. Banging on stuff – Have you ever watched a boy play with his toys? It is more like banging them around. Have you noticed how your man fix’s things? Yes, it’s pretty much the same technique.

30. Driving fast – Many men suffer from the Dunning-Kruger effect. This means that we think we can do anything and resist suffering the consequences for it, regardless of how bad we really are at it.

31. Violence –Hollywood box office sales can’t be wrong. Men love violence, whether it is watching it on-screen or initiating war with another country. Researchers say all this underlined violence is more about getting women than anything else.

32. Gambling – This is how most men get ahead. Men gambled with their lives in order to be seen as macho, and get women.

33. Wearing sneakers – Whether he is 8 or 80, sneakers are a man’s comfort footwear.

34. Winning (a.k.a.  “The Charlie Sheen Effect”) – Guys like to win at everything, which makes us sore losers. I think Charlie Sheen said it best: “You are either winning or you are losing; there is nothing in between.” “Make a choice to win, and you win.” “Winning, are you starting to get the concept now?”

35. Laughter – He particularly likes it when women find his humor entertaining.

36. Problem solving

37. Brain vegetation (a.k.a. television watching) – A man’s brain needs to vegetate in order to retool.

38. Chivalry – All guys like to be the knight in shining armor.

39. Being the breadwinner – 85 percent of men like to be the breadwinner of the family.

40. The man cave (a.k.a. garage) – A lot of guys love hanging out in their garage. Nothing much is getting done in there, mind you; he just likes to be where things can get done!

41. WD-40 – We don’t really know much about this stuff. However, if you can’t fix it with duct tape, WD-40 is a man’s next most laziest option.

42. Grilling – Who says men can’t cook? All we need is an open flame and something dead, and we can make a meal out of it. For all you vegetarians, mushrooms and soy work, too.

43. Electronics/Gadgets – All men are very competitive, and they like to have the best of all things electronic.

44. Alcohol – Studies suggest that alcohol is one of the most popular methods for a man to forget about his woes.

45. Temptation – The majority of men are not cheaters. However, the vast majority do enjoy thinking about it.

46. Happy women – It’s true, a happy woman does make a happier man!

47. His privacy – 83 percent of men respect your privacy and hope that you will do the same for him.

48. A healthy ego  Men lie about the number of partners they’ve had. Unlike women, a good portion of guys add to that number, rather than subtract from it.

49. Fantasizing about your friends – Most guys have thought about sex with your friends.

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15 thoughts on “49 Things Every Man Loves

  1. Rebacca

    If you actually read the part before it says “There are a couple of rules I have put into place in order for this article to succeed. Rule number one, this list represents the majority of guys. No, not every guy likes these. Some guys like playing with Barbie. However, they are not in the majority. Rule number two, I realize that there are a lot of women who like these things, too. We don’t hold a contract on any of this stuff. It is still a free country, and if you happen to be one of those women who like these things, kindly leave your phone number (just kidding), as I’m sure a good portion of the single guys out there would like to get to know you!”
    Learn to read!!!DAMN!

    Reply
  2. marc from the uk

    Hello Gina rose! fab to hear from you and that hair colour and eyes sounds great! ( notice in good ol blighty we spell it correctly the word colour!!!) I remember when my parents in the early 1970’s we lived in Berlin but us kids shared a school with Americans, we were all in the armed forces. I had this amazing argument with my best school mate who was american over how to spell the word colour ( color) So we had a bet and I sure knew I was going to win and so did he, we marched up to the teacher and argued in front of her, her response???? we were both right!!!!! That was one of my earliest memories of being open minded,I bet on winning his chewing gum! Those american kids just had the best chewing gum in the whole wide world, we english had just one boring brand!!! bet was a draw! Lesson learned! However I remember the article about Duck feet, and I have my own theory on ladies feet, I think most men find large ladies feet a threat to there Man status, as they still deep down consider themselve’s the protectors and tall ladies or big footed ones are deemed a threat?! My theory, thats why I feel that tall ladies struggle with getting mates, as the male feels he is instictively still the protector hunter gatherer bla bal bla! Anyway have a fab weekend fishing ( PUT THEM BACK IN!) Marc from the UK 🙂

    Reply
  3. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi Marc from the UK !!!

    How are you ? I so enjoy reading your comments…… Eric & I….hooking up ?????

    Don’t think it would work…..I have ” duck feet “…..LOL LOL LOL…..
    Eric knows what I’m referring to……it has to do with one of his articles about males preferring women with small feet…..I have small feet but wide……size 5 DD width : duck feet !!!!! Ha Ha Ha

    Besides….I’m not a brunette…..I’m a redhead with green eyes.

    Have a nice weekend, Marc…..and Eric too !

    Marc from the UK May 4, 2012 at 5:07 am
    Hilarious and entertaining, I think you and Gina should hook up !!!

    Reply
  4. Denise

    Haha – some women DEFINITELY like some of these things, too. Like driving fast. I’m bad at it, too. But I like trying to beat my last time… So glad most men prefer brunettes.

    Reply
  5. linda

    I agree with David Not every man is like this frankly I dont want a man like this have one and he treats me like crap . Thank You david for shedding light that there are men that are NOT like this

    Linda

    Reply
  6. David A. Carlson

    Much of this is not true for every man.
    2) I insist that others have the last bite. I do not want to be selfish.
    5) I do not care for sports. In fact, growing up and living in Texas, I see how much a stupid game is worth to so many people. It will have no outcome on your lives, it wont cure cancer or end war. In fact, many colleges give scholarships to high school atheletes so the college can have a good team. Then the student is many times allowed a free ride through college so a good player can remain on the team, depriving the student of a true education. Not all athelete scholarship students are like this, however. Many do take their college classes seriously and take responsibility for their grades and their education.
    8) I have never had oral sex, and I dont understand the big deal. Seems like a disgusting thing to put in your mouth, until you think about how filthy the human mouth is. Then it seems like a disgusting thing to put near your genitals.
    13) Again, I dont see the point. Allowing another partner in your relationship, even for “experimenting” seems to only cause problems in the relationship later on.
    22) I prefer redheads, but what really turns me on is what is inside the womans heart.
    24) I do not believe sex can be casual. Even if it starts out that way, it can later turn into feelings one or both partners were not expecting. This can cause troubles in a friendship between the two partners.
    28) Real men dont like to see a woman crying, but when they do, we take on the aspect of the protector or the problem solver. These things are ingrained into us.
    29) I believe that society has molded us into thinking that boys need toys they can bang together. My nephew likes playing with cooking utensils, but he pretends to cook with them instead of banging the together. And men fix things by banging on them because most of the things women ask men to fix are the type of things that banging is required, such as fixing a car, fixing something on the house, etc. If you think men are just programmed to hit things, then next time you need something fixed, dont ask your man to do it. Do it yourself and see if it can be done without bainging on it.
    31) Not all men like violence. I, myself, prefer a good comedy. (A good one means it is mentally stimulating in a funny way. Not a jock comedy or stoner comedy or frat-boys-getting-drunk-and-getting-laid comedy) I have enjoyed some movies that did include violence, but this was because of the plot, character growth, etc. Not simply because people were getting blown up. Although I do like a good explosion and will watch anything on MythBusters because sooner or later, they are going to blow something up.
    32) I do not gamble. I work for my money, why would I want to risk throwing it away. Why should I give my hard earned money to someone else because they had a better card than me completely at random? Why should I take someone elses money for the same reason?
    33) I do not wear sneakers. Either boots (I prefer combat boots. Something tough thats going to last through everything I put it through) or sandals. No in between. I am not running track and Im not in highschool trying to impress everyone else with the latest kicks. I use practical foot wear.
    34) Doesnt everyone like to win? Is this study saying women enjoy losing. It feels good to win. The problem comes when winning begans to feel like a drug, and you need to win just to be happy with your life.
    38) Oh, how I wish this were true. But I have seen so many men treat their women like crap. Cutting them down instead of building them up. Not holding the door open for their own women, much less a female stranger. This is not chivalry. Picking fights with smaller and weaker individuals, or beating up their wives and girlfriends. There is no chivalry in this.
    43) I am not competitive with electronics. I have a cheap cell phone, but its good for emergencies. Thats all I need it to do. It plays music, which is good, because I dont know the code for the radio in my car. And if I did, I wouldnt need a big expensive sound system. Those expensive sound systems with their loud bass are just ways for men to beat on their chest and show the people around them how big of an ape they are. To the rest of us, it is an annoyance and also shows how inconsiderate the person is whos playing their music that loud.
    44) Once again, are they suggesting women dont do the same thing. Not all men drink. I use to smoke marijuana, but have quit and do not use it anymore. But I prefered that to alcahol. I will drink on rare occassions. But not enough to get drunk, just enough to be social. And if I dont feel like drinking, I dont.
    48) I do not lie about the number of sexual partners I have had. And those that do obviously only see women as a conquest. If a man talks constantly about his conquests, he most likely treats his wife or girlfriend like a trophy, like a possession. And he doesnt keep prying eyes from you out of mere jelousy. He sees you as his property, and he doesnt want anyone to steal his things.
    Wow. 1/3 of this is either bullcrap, or if your dating someone like this, they are bullcrap. I cant say on the rest, except for the part about mental downtime for a guy. This is true. I have heard a comedian compare it to defregging a computer, and that sounds about right to me. But that mental downtime can also be compared to meditation. It allows the brain to stop using energy on everything so it can use more energy to concentrate on more important things peacefully and sometimes subconciously.

    Reply
  7. misskrystalmisskrystal

    this is great eric 🙂
    i think #39 is changing though in some areas…. this is awesome. thanks.
    miss krystal

    Reply
  8. katrin paulsen

    my man loves most things mentioned exept he has a very low sex drive with me but he
    cheated twice and had no problem.whats up with that.well he does drink a lot and does occ.
    cocaine.

    Reply
  9. -quinn ext.5484

    and to think all us woman need to make us happy is a perfect shade of lipstick and duct tape. (oh, and to own a big johnson- one that you can name)
    love this article…lol.
    -quinn

    Reply
  10. virgo2757

    I believe it was comedian Elayne Boosler who said, “What a man really wants is a close, loving, intimate relationship with a woman who will leave him alone.”

    Reply
  11. jana

    Loved your article this morning!!!! Had a good giggle, so thanks for the good start to this fine morning. Are you sure you want my phone number?? lol. I had a second look through it, and this time counted how many things I enjoy as well and scored between 35/40, I guess I am a hidden guy then. Arent men simple creatures really though?? Actually women are much the same, nothing mysterious, but dont tell the men, we gotta have fun somehow dont we. Keep up the good work, and thanks for the smiles today. xx

    Reply

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