The Essentials Men Love
The things that appeal to men might seem pretty simple and generally revolve around those things that define men: sex, food, power and sports. There are a couple of rules I have put into place in order for this article to succeed. Rule number one, this list represents the majority of guys. No, not every guy likes these. Some guys like playing with Barbie. However, they are not in the majority. Rule number two, I realize that there are a lot of women who like these things, too. We don’t hold a contract on any of this stuff. It is still a free country, and if you happen to be one of those women who like these things, kindly leave your phone number (just kidding), as I’m sure a good portion of the single guys out there would like to get to know you!
1. The word, “Yes” – Men love approval, whether it is agreeing to a date or an evening of sex. Men are particularly susceptible, because they are the ones who do the majority of asking for stuff. Enjoy it ladies, because if the roles were reversed, studies show that you might not be as picky with whom you end up with.
2. Eating the last bite – Women are wonderful caretakers. This makes it hard for them to eat the last tidbit of many things. Men look forward to getting that last bite of cake, the last sip of orange juice, or the last squeeze of toothpaste.
3. Internet porn – Some surveys suggest that Internet porn may have been enjoyed (at one time or another) by darn near 100 percent of the current male population.
4. Orgasms – Men are obsessed with the orgasm, because they are spoiled by it. Men can orgasm with a casual stranger, life-long partner, or a wrinkled up section of a Sears underwear catalog. Women reach orgasm one-third as often as men during hookups and up to three-fourths as often as men when invested in a steady relationship.
“Much to my amazement, I have discovered that there are women who have never had the big O with another person or alone. Ladies, it is okay to have the big O and lots of them, for that matter.” – Psychic Quinn ext. 5484
6. Video games – Studies suggest that a man’s brain completely shuts down in order to recuperate. Hence, video games are the perfect opportunity for this.
7. Owning a “Big Johnson” – In the U.S., breast reduction surgery may be the fifth most common plastic surgery. However, how many men do you think wished they could have a smaller manhood? About one percent, according to surveys.
8. Oral sex
9. Contraception – Nearly three-quarters of men would take a male birth control pill if it were available. However, once the side effects were released, I am willing to bet that percentage would take a nose dive.
10. One woman – Research suggests that most men would rather have one good woman then a harem in their bed every night. As it turns out, a couple of horny guys always skew these results, making the rest of us look like dogs.
11. Food – The cliche that men think about sex every seven seconds is not true. While they may indeed think about sex more often than women, they also think about other things proportionately more than women, such as food.
12. Sleep – Two of a man’s most fond activities in life are sleeping with a sex partner and just plain sleeping.
13. Threesomes – While guys may like one woman, many of them dream of sharing a bed with two (if for only one night).
14. His own chair – Remember as a kid, how mom would sometimes let you sit in her chair? Do you remember dad ever letting you do the same thing?
15. Women in commando – This isn’t about running around town without a lid on her yoni, but rather, in the privacy of your own home.
16. A woman who speaks her mind – She is preferred to a woman who expects him to read her mind.
17. A woman who makes the first move – Guys like a woman who knows what she wants. There is a lot of confusion here. Does a man turn down a woman because she was the one to ask him first? No, he turned her down because he didn’t like her in the first place.
18. A woman who never says, “Nothing” – Men hate this answer, no matter what the context.
19. A woman who always says, “Fine”– This can be more to his detriment, as “fine” is often worse than the dreaded “nothing.”
“Trust cannot exist where there’s fear, and fear exists in the unknown future which you have no control over; live in the present moment.” – Psychic Rivers ext. 5273
20. More talk, less text (if he likes you) – Surveys show that boys, age 17, text 30 times a day; teen girl’s text 100 times a day. However, if you are a parent, your bill has probably already told you this.
21. Rights to the remote
22. Brunettes – Various surveys over the years seem to suggest that the majority of guys prefer brunettes to just about any other hair color.
24. Casual sex – In one study, 70 percent of men who were asked by a strange woman to have sex, agreed without any questions asked.
25. Cuddling – The Kinsey Institute claims that the majority of men also like cuddling.
26. Boobs – Researchers came to the conclusion that men really do like women’s breasts.
27. Being the alpha male – Men all love to flaunt their stuff and be the top dog.
28. Dry eyes – Studies suggest that sobbing in front of a man may work to your advantage, if you are either trying to lower his testosterone or put a major damper on his libido.
29. Banging on stuff – Have you ever watched a boy play with his toys? It is more like banging them around. Have you noticed how your man fix’s things? Yes, it’s pretty much the same technique.
30. Driving fast – Many men suffer from the Dunning-Kruger effect. This means that we think we can do anything and resist suffering the consequences for it, regardless of how bad we really are at it.
31. Violence –Hollywood box office sales can’t be wrong. Men love violence, whether it is watching it on-screen or initiating war with another country. Researchers say all this underlined violence is more about getting women than anything else.
32. Gambling – This is how most men get ahead. Men gambled with their lives in order to be seen as macho, and get women.
33. Wearing sneakers – Whether he is 8 or 80, sneakers are a man’s comfort footwear.
34. Winning (a.k.a. “The Charlie Sheen Effect”) – Guys like to win at everything, which makes us sore losers. I think Charlie Sheen said it best: “You are either winning or you are losing; there is nothing in between.” “Make a choice to win, and you win.” “Winning, are you starting to get the concept now?”
35. Laughter – He particularly likes it when women find his humor entertaining.
36. Problem solving
37. Brain vegetation (a.k.a. television watching) – A man’s brain needs to vegetate in order to retool.
38. Chivalry – All guys like to be the knight in shining armor.
39. Being the breadwinner – 85 percent of men like to be the breadwinner of the family.
40. The man cave (a.k.a. garage) – A lot of guys love hanging out in their garage. Nothing much is getting done in there, mind you; he just likes to be where things can get done!
41. WD-40 – We don’t really know much about this stuff. However, if you can’t fix it with duct tape, WD-40 is a man’s next most laziest option.
42. Grilling – Who says men can’t cook? All we need is an open flame and something dead, and we can make a meal out of it. For all you vegetarians, mushrooms and soy work, too.
43. Electronics/Gadgets – All men are very competitive, and they like to have the best of all things electronic.
44. Alcohol – Studies suggest that alcohol is one of the most popular methods for a man to forget about his woes.
45. Temptation – The majority of men are not cheaters. However, the vast majority do enjoy thinking about it.
46. Happy women – It’s true, a happy woman does make a happier man!
47. His privacy – 83 percent of men respect your privacy and hope that you will do the same for him.
48. A healthy ego – Men lie about the number of partners they’ve had. Unlike women, a good portion of guys add to that number, rather than subtract from it.
49. Fantasizing about your friends – Most guys have thought about sex with your friends.
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