Anthea from Western Cape, South Africa writes:
Hi Cortney, although I am married, I constantly dream of my ex-boyfriend from eight years ago. He was the love of my life. In the dreams he is either with his parents or his current wife. Then he walks toward me to be with me. He sometimes talks to me, and previously I talked back, but now I ignore him. I am scared that I will never be free of him. He hurt me too much and that is why I left him, but I still loved him so much during the beginning of my new relationship and marriage. I finally moved on last year, but the dreams keep haunting me.
Dreams seem to be the last thing to go when a relationship ends. We usually dream of a past relationship when we feel there is something left unfinished, unsaid or unresolved. You need a sense of closure. Assuming that you don’t want to contact your ex, you might try writing him a letter (but not mailing it), stating all the feelings—both positive and negative—that he brought out in you, and the feelings you’re still struggling with, which may reveal the reason you’re still dreaming about him. Then tell him goodbye, in the letter.
It’s alarming that you still refer to this man as the love of your life, even though he hurt you badly. To find out why, I looked up your chart and saw that you have Sun, Mercury, Venus and Mars in Taurus, a “fixed” sign that often has a hard time letting go. Your Moon in Aquarius, the sign of change, helps with transitions, but it forms a T-cross with your Sun and Uranus. Taurus needs security and consistency in a relationship, but the Uranus influence creates a craving for someone who evokes extreme emotions in you. Perhaps you can channel this need for excitement into your work so you don’t desire such extreme highs and lows in your personal life. Hope that helps!
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