Dana in Winter Haven writes:
I have a few questions. My first question is the one you get all the time. I just went to a high school reunion where everyone there said I was the most beautiful of our classmates. All the rest, I must say, are grey haired and overweight. Some even went as far as saying I should be a model. I seem to be the only single one. I was widowed at 36 and raised my kids by myself. I want desperately to meet someone. What do you see? I also want to buy a bigger house. I have seen one that I like but it is up there in price. I also would like to retire and move out of state. I think I need to invest in my state’s retirement system and stay for five more years. Do you think I should buy the house and stay? Will I meet someone here if I do?
It seems like you have a pretty good grip on your life – you just aren’t sure what direction you really want to go. What it boils down to is that you have some decisions to make, because you have choices.
I do see you moving out of state, but not for several more years. However, if you should choose to buy a new house, that act would very likely keep you in the area you are in for longer than you plan. It’s most certainly an option for you… including the pricey house you have your eye on. What you really need to figure out is if that house will bring you enough happiness to justify the changes you will face.
Finding love looks like it is going to continue to be a bit challenging for you. I’m just not seeing you as being accessible to the type and quality of man you hope to meet. This is a circumstance that can be changed, you just need to extend yourself and your social circles.
While you are in your current area, I do see you meeting a gentleman that you will be very fond of, but the relationship has more of a companionship feel to it rather than marriage. Part of this is because he has no desire to relocate and you really don’t want to stay where you are indefinitely. This does not make for a bad relationship or experience, it just has limits. You will enjoy him and the relationship, but I don’t see you as falling head-over-heels in love with him.
For you, relocation will be a close equivalent to a rebirth. It will be exciting and empowering for you, and brings new energy and options into your life. Finding someone to share your life with is still going to be a concern for you, but not as challenging as what you are familiar with. I see you living in a gated community or similar arrangement where there are gatherings and events that encourage the development of new friendships and romance.
While the road to love for you may be a longer one than you’d like, don’t throw in the towel. You are an intelligent and attractive lady who just needs to learn how to loosen up and live a little. Good looks are always appreciated from a distance, but someone who lives life fully with fun and laughter rarely ever does so alone.