Red Responds: Everything Was Going So Well

Dear Red,

Last year I went through a huge heartbreak, moving on from a guy I was engaged to and finding out a lot about myself and what I wanted along the way. Recently I was asked out on a date by a guy I have known casually since high, school but never hung out with. We went out and hit it off right away!

We spent every day for the next two weeks together, meeting his friends and family (whom I loved). About a week or two into this he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes. I was immediately happy and he told me how happy he was — he had a huge smile on his face whenever we saw each other! We dated for about a month and went to a friend’s New Year’s party. During the party something happened and he seemed to all of a sudden change his mind about our relationship. He didn’t talk to me for a day and a half and then he broke it off. I am left hurt and confused. We had so, so much in common and everything was going so well up until that point. I guess what I’m asking is will he ever come back to me? Does he just need time to sort things out, or is it over forever? Should I stop hoping he’ll call?

Jennifer in Barrie

Dear Jennifer,

To answer your question, yes, your boyfriend will eventually call you and try to become part of your life once again. When the time comes, I want you to think very carefully on how you will handle the situation, because he is very capable of disappearing again.

The truth is, he was questioning the relationship before the party, but not voicing his concerns to you. This is a guy who isn’t quite ready to be settled in a relationship, and definitely has issues when it comes to communicating. While this doesn’t make him a bad guy, it does make him a higher risk venture when it comes to matters of the heart.

Based on this moment in time, it looks as if you will not hear from him until sometime in March. So, if you choose to hold on to the hope that he will call, you will be faced with disappointment for a while longer.

Quite frankly, while you will be given the opportunity to explore a relationship with him further, I don’t see him as ultimately being the one for you. Your greatest happiness lies with a man who has not yet come into your life, but you will meet him within the next two years.

The best thing to do is keep going forward with your life. Your past is in no way is a prediction of your future, it is only the path that got you to this moment in time.

Brightest Blessings,
Red
Ext. 9226

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