Psychic Q&A: The Neighbor’s Wife

Psychic Q&A: The Neighbor’s Wife

The Men in Her Life

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Dear Psychic Reed,

I can’t figure out if my husband is still happy with me or not. Some new neighbors moved in and my husband seems to spend a lot of time in our bedroom now. I’m wondering if he is watching the neighbor’s wife through the window. I’ve tried to change myself—I’m nicer—but no matter what I do my husband has to be in the bedroom or outside when the neighbor’s wife is home. It seems like he’s timing it.

I have no luck with my boys either. Every time I try to have a conversation with them they get sarcastic or act like I’m bothering them. My oldest wants to go to college but I’m worried he won’t be able to afford it. My husband and I aren’t paying for his education but I’m not sure my son will get enough scholarships to keep himself out of debt.

I really don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like my family doesn’t appreciate me. What’s going on with the men in my life?

Debbie M.

Psychic Reed ext. 5105 responds:

Dear Debbie,

Yes, your husband is still happy with you. He has watched the neighbor’s wife, but this is a harmless bit of fantasy and will fade in another month. He has no plans of having an affair or replacing you. Your husband wouldn’t have an affair with her, even if she was willing, which she would not be. Your neighbor’s wife is going to remain loyal to her husband.

Marriage doesn’t keep us from the occasional daydream about others. What you’ve done so far is beautiful! You’ve used this as an opportunity to grow. Keep up the good work there. A great next step would be to check out the book, Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. It’s all about how to turn tense communication into peaceful communication. Rosenberg’s ideas can help you communicate with your husband and ease tension with your boys at the same time.

I’m not suggesting that all the communication issues are your fault or are yours to fix, but I can tell you that you are the person most able to bring healthy change to the way your family communicates. You hold the power to transform your life and the lives of your men.

On the subject of appreciation, I can tell it’s sure lacking in your life. The first step should be you starting to appreciate yourself more. Take your needs seriously because you are worth it! Step two, be mindful of just how much you are doing for these men. I feel like you are putting in way more energy than is necessary. You do so many things for them, thinking that if you just work hard enough they will appreciate it. Well, it may seem counterintuitive, but the more you do for them, the less appreciative they are going to be.

It’s right to want to be appreciated; you just need a new approach. When they watch you put yourself last time and time again, they’re naturally going to do it, too. By treating yourself the way you do, you are inadvertently training the men in your life to treat you the way they do.

Your oldest son will go to college and will have some debt by the time he’s finished. It won’t be the end of him; he’ll just have to make payments like the rest of us. Fortunately, he will complete a degree and have a job that will allow him to do it.

You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You are smarter than you let show. If you are determined, you are able to grow. Keep being awesome and start giving yourself credit for it. Your family is on the verge of a beautiful transformation and you don’t have to worry about your neighbor’s wife or your sons in the meantime.

Many blessings,


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