What Kind of Reality Have You Created for Yourself?
Take a second and look at the world around you. Look at the space you currently occupy. Look out a nearby window or down an aisle or hall. What do you see? Do you think you see what everyone else sees when they look at those same things? You actually see things differently. That’s because you are not a casual, impartial observer of the world in which you live, even if you think you are.
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The world around you is your reality, but it’s not as simple as that. You take what you see and experience, filter the feelings and emotions evoked, throw in your history, and then use all that to form your reality. No two realities are exactly the same because reality is a personal experience.
Are You Challenges Real?
Now think about the challenges you’re currently facing. Are the challenges real or perceived? Let’s take a look at some common challenges many of us face—lack of money, the desire to lose weight and the need for a romantic relationship. We all want to be richer, thinner and in love, right? That’s the reality we’re striving for. But our currently reality is that we are poor, fat and lonely—at least, that’s the reality we’ve created for ourselves.
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So to get more money, which we need in order to keep up with friends or family, we could get a second job. And to lose weight, which we have to do in order to feel good about ourselves, we could go to the gym twice a day. And to stop being lonely, which can only be solved by finding a romantic relationship, we could sign up for all the dating websites and say yes to every date. Do you think you need to take action to improve your reality?
A Shift in Perception
You do need to take action, but like your reality, the action you need to take is all in your head. I’m talking about a shift in perception. Perhaps your challenges are actually non-challenges that you’ve created for yourself because you think there is something wrong with your life. Of course you’re unhappy because you don’t have money. Of course you’re filled with self-loathing because you’re not an “ideal” weight. Of course you’re lonely because no one is in love with you. Let’s change your perception.
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A Change in Focus
When it comes to money, you need to be grateful for what you do have and live within your means. You need to focus less on the material possessions of others and stop envying them. When it comes to your weight, you need to stop striving for this ideal that doesn’t exist. If you’re healthy, it doesn’t matter that your thighs touch or you have some cellulite on your backside. Be thankful that you get to live another day. And instead of equating loneliness with being single, think about the love you already have in your life. You are loved and nurtured by your friends, family and pets.
Your Version vs. Their Version
Let’s not get tied down by our version of reality. Know that the way you see the world and your place in it, is not how others see the world and their place in it. Know that the way you see yourself in the world is not how others see you. Whatever glaring “flaws” you have defined yourself by are not the “flaws” others see in you.
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Your Reality is a Choice
There is no such thing as reality, because what makes the world real is different for everyone. Remember that you have the ability to form your reality, and you get to choose what it looks like and what you look like in it. If you choose to construct a reality that is filled with challenges, self-loathing and insecurities, that is all you will see and experience. But if you choose to construct a reality that is filled with fulfilling and enlightening experiences, happiness and self-love, that is all you will see and experience. The choice is yours.