You dread meeting them for lunch, but go anyway. Hours later you’re exhausted, have a headache and make weak excuses to run for your life.
They’re emotional vampires and they’ve just tried to energetically suck the life force right out of you. No wonder you’re dazed and confused; no wonder you don’t feel good around them. You’ve just been zapped by an emotional vampire.
These are the kinds of people who hunt for victims to energize them and keep their spirits up because they can’t or won’t tap into their own spiritual energy source for revitalization.
No, they don’t actually drain the blood from your neck, although you may have a stiff neck by the time you flee, but they do drain the joy from your life and your wish to spend more time with them.
What do they look like? They’re easy to spot. Chronic bad moods. Boring retelling of the same stories. Depressed and like it. Happily play the role of victim. Lead all one-sided conversations. Dominate the conversation by talking over you. Talks only about their problems, never asking about yours. Make negative comments about everyone and everything. Change the subject back to themselves if you should be lucky enough to interject more than a nod. Never know when to go home.
How do you know if you’ve been zapped by an emotional or psychic vampire? Your energy feels more drained after you spend time together. When anxious or upset they offer you no empathy, but instead find ways to provoke your angst even further. You experience a psychic feeling of phantom tentacles reaching out from their body to yours. You experience increased insomnia after spending time with them. You wonder where your anxiety build up comes from, but can’t quite pinpoint the cause.
Don’t feel too bad, though, because emotional vampires are people who walk into any room and suck the life energy from anyone unlucky enough to walk into the emotional vampire’s personal space. And, if you don’t walk into their space, they’ll scan the room for a likely victim and walk into yours.
Some emotional vampires know what they are doing; others do it on an unconscious level. Those who are unaware tend to have very difficult relationships, home lives and work interactions until they recognize what they are doing.
You can do one of several things to protect yourself from their bleeding energy:
- Tell them the truth, that you cannot get a word in edgewise and that the relationship feels one-sided to you. Let them know what you want from them. They’ll either wake up or move on.
- Avoid them and do not spend any more time with them. If you must interact for work reasons, or at family gatherings, set good time boundaries and don’t stay with them any longer than you have to. And don’t let them corner you, keep circulating.
An emotional vampire who unknowingly exhibit these traits but later recognizes the truth of their disturbing ways can change their draining behavior quite dramatically. All they have to do is begin a spiritual practice, such as prayer, meditation or walking in nature. When they regularly practice this spiritual recharging, you’ll find them an entirely different person. Those who make this effort will find that all their relationships improve, their mental, emotional and physical health takes a turn for the better and they will be surprised at how easily they make and keep new friends.