Don’t Ruin a Good Thing!
Do you consider yourself a hopeless romantic? If you are guilty of the following mistakes, you may very well be hopeless… but not necessarily in just the romance department. You may be guilty of not maintaining a healthy relationship without throwing it to the dogs every now and then. For the very first time on the California Psychics blog, I present to you the seven preferred ways to ruin true love, and best of all, this advice won’t cost you a thing… other than your relationship.
They say a white lie is innocent enough, so, the same must be true for a white insult. Whenever your significant other is feeling down, ugly, or depressed, there is nothing better than initiating the “Get-your-crap-together” program, which is comprised of a “no-compliment” policy that will help get your partner up and feeling “great” about themselves! Such examples of this helpful advice include the phrases, “You’re an idiot,” “You’re an ass,” and my personal favorite, “Get the hell out of my face; you smell like old cheese.” Get personalized advice, contact a psychic today!
The Unhelpful Observationalist
In today’s world of technology and insight, everybody loves a partner who scrutinizes their shortcomings and reminds them why their place should be on the bottom rung. The best way to accomplish this is to recant to your partner why they are not good enough. This can be accomplished with a number of phrases, notably, “You’re not going to actually wear that,” “Where’s the rest of your paycheck,” and “Didn’t you used to have an ass?” Do you feel like your partner doesn’t respect you? Justine ext. 5402 knows what’s in their heart.
The Tin Trophy
Your partner works hard for their accomplishments, and there is no greater reward than the quintessential tin trophy. These verbal trophies are usually tarnished, have a generic nameplate, and are designed to belittle your partner’s accomplishments, so they will work harder the next time around. If you are unfamiliar with these forms of flattery, I’ll give you a few examples.
Your Partner: “Honey, I was promoted to a manager.”
Your Reply: “Humph” (grunt).
Lengthy Alternative: “I guess your boss thought you deserved something (unsaid words: “after 25 years of nothing.”).
Some relationship experts recommend explaining a particular grievance you are having with your mate, rather than resorting to name calling. For example, “Could you please put the dishes in the washer? Today is going to be hectic, and I could use the extra help.” However, this advice is never as effective at driving your true disdain to the home plate, by combining all your frustration into one big judgment call. This will not only discourage a particular action, but criticize your partner’s entire character, such as “You’re a freaking slob!”
Sarcasm is Judgment’s Sexier Single Cousin (Single, Being the Key Word)
Straightforward criticism has its place in relationships. However, those who are crafty, can offer particularly stinging criticism, under the guise of making someone also the butt of a crap-tastic joke (i.e., “Honey, I’d like to see your point of view, but quite frankly, I can’t get my head that far up my a**.”).
Mr. and Mrs. Nitpick
There may be more than one way to swab out a toilet bowl. However, I guarantee yours is probably the best, and most preferred way. This is why you should always demand that your partner do things in exactly the same way as you ask them to. Any deviation from the plan should be punished severely. I do stress that it has to be your way, or else you won’t like them anymore! Why do you feel the need to nitpick your partner? Joyce ext. 9598 has the insight you’re looking for!
If at First You Don’t Get What You Want… Threaten, Threaten Again
It’s not always easy to get what you want. You have to consider that your partner has their own needs which you will be required to squelch in order to ensure it doesn’t get in the way of what you’re truly after. To do this, you could either have a civil conversation, followed by a compromise which will get you about 50 percent of what you want, or if you would rather receive 100 percent, you have to make it clear that if you don’t get the full monty, you will be required to inflict brisk punishment in the form of sex withholding, genital dismemberment, or a trip to divorce court.