Your Questions, Answered
What is a guy thinking about on a first date? What does it mean if we make it to the third date? Does he really expect me to sleep with him on the fourth date? Scanning across a host of forums and chat rooms, it seems as if every woman has the same romance-related questions on her mind. I think these are all great questions, and they can best be answered using a log of how the typical dating sequence might go with the average guy. Get past the first date with help from psychic and love expert, Venus ext. 9463! She’s got the tips you need to seal the deal.
On the First Date:
On a first date a guy is attracted and curious about a woman. If the date is going well, he will think about where he could take her on a future date, what she might be like in bed, and if she is having as good of a time as he is. If the date is not going so well, he will find himself calculating how much the date is costing him, how long he’s been out, and whether or not he will still have time to meet up with some friends afterward for a couple of beers and discuss his tale of woe. In addition, men also worry about being ushered into the friendship zone, especially if that isn’t what they want. Regardless of how he feels about a girl, the f-bomb is always taken as a loss for the team.
In a sense, a first date is a lot like buying a car. He will look around for any signs of damage, and excess mileage (baggage) from a previous owner. He will take her out on the open road, and may even put his foot all the way down on the accelerator (the “accidental” boob brush) to see what kind of a reaction he gets. He’ll probably wonder what’s under the hood, but settle for listening to the purr of her engine (imagining the sound of her voice in bed). Assuming the “check engine light” does not make an appearance, he will end the evening having made the decision of whether he is ready to buy (second date), lease (recommend to a friend), rent for the day (one-night stand), or if he needs to go home and think about it (“I’ll call you”).
On the Second Date:
On the second date the guy will decide that he wants to take his curiosity further, because the girl has peaked his interested, or he will be one of those guys who has already decided she is his soulmate. Research suggests that while women occasionally fall in love at first sight, most guys can experience this instantaneously at the beginning of a relationship (or even before a relationship has been established). This is what is known as the instant relationship (assuming the woman is game), and may lead to unrealistic expectations, considering the initial commitment is relying on feelings, rather than time and experience.
On the Third and Fourth Dates:
Depending on how the first two dates go, a man will need to decide somewhere between the third and fourth date how serious he is about a relationship. This is the point where a guy must choose between the path of the Good Guy or the Bad Boy—either one being slightly treacherous to his ego, according to his own experience. The way a guy sees it, the good guy usually ends up being mistreated, disrespected, taken advantage of, and will end up in the friendship zone (lacking sex) for the majority of his bachelor life. The bad boy may get plenty of sex, but the price he will pay is having the label, “player” or “jerk,” and setting himself up for a lifetime of meaningless relationships.
According to research the majority of guys want a family and a good relationship with a spouse at some point. Sex is rarely the driving force in a guy’s life. There is only a handful of truly bad eggs out there, and you will know them by their distrust in (all) women, poor outlook on marriage, infatuation with their own bachelorhood, and disinterest in having children one day.
On the Sixth Through Tenth Dates:
Somewhere between the sixth and tenth date the good guy is thinking, “Okay, this girl is pretty cool.” Maybe we could hang out exclusively for a while, as there is really nobody else I would rather date. At this point, the guy has thought about his potential for other dates, and has decided if he is ready to limit himself to just one girl for the time being. This is also a time when a guy thinks about introducing a girl to his parents/friends, and what it would be like to take her on an extended vacation (or “test-honeymoon”). The player is still playing, but most women will have packed up and left long before the tenth date. Are you dating player after player? It must be the energy you’re putting out there. If you want to change things up and start attracting men with long-term relationship potential, give Psychic Jacqueline ext. 9472 a call!
No two guys are a like, so tell us about your own experiences journeying across that sea of love (and heartbreak).