Should You Put it All Out There?
To make every man want you is a huge promise to make, and one that Marie Forleo, a life coach and relationship/love expert, has made to millions of women for several years now. To consider Marie’s book Make Every Man Want You a dating tool is a bit of a stretch, as the book is really more about building self-esteem. The idea is that by gaining renewed confidence, you will become more attractive to men. From the standpoint of psychology, she’s actually not that far off base.
Confidence brings value to your presence, and makes others want to know you. A confident, smiling woman can cause a drop in conversation in a bar full of drunken business men, just as a hooting monkey influences zoo goers to prepare for flying excrement. Forleo reminds women that they are irresistible to men just how they are. If a woman is somehow not successful at attracting her soulmate; she either does not believe in herself, or her whiny disposition is most likely at fault for making all those men deaf to her inner beauty.
One of Forleo’s most valuable advice in the book, is to avoid being needy or insecure, don’t whine, complain, or worry; maintain focus on yourself, and take men at face value. Forleo talks about querulous and vulnerable behavior as being a big turn off. It’s safe to say that most guys don’t like drama. She implores to the women who have bought her book, seeking to attract all men, that they don’t really need a man. By choosing to remain happily unhitched, they will take charge of their own life and destiny, and attract these guys in the process.
In Forleo’s opinion, trying to change a guy will always end in disaster. Your best bet is to choose carefully before bringing one home. For this reason, Forleo does not recommend taking on charity cases. All guys are bought and paid for with the understanding they come “used” and “as is.” Men don’t come with a warranty, expressed guarantee, or easy-return policy. Whether he is completely broken, or just missing a few screws, once you take him off the shelf, there will be no taking him in for repairs. Just like that finicky clothes washer that takes a couple of hip slams before it starts up; your guy may require a little patience, or a lot.
“Sex can be very emotional, but remember to look at sex in a practical view too so that it won’t dictate how you think you feel emotionally. If you can enjoy a person with or without sex, then that’s a special connection.” – Leo ext. 5265
Sex-wise, her viewpoint is fairly liberal, suggesting that a woman can sleep with any man, so long as her reasons are clear. There are no techniques, per say, in this book, as Forleo does not believe in tricking a guy into a long-term relationship. The only way to have an honest relationship is to be yourself. Women are inherently perfect how they are, after all. However, if you happen to enjoy whining about sour mojitos, blue skies, and green grass, then you may be out of luck. Just because your perfect in your own mind, doesn’t mean that every man will agree with you.
While considering the possibility of making every guy want one woman, I had to wonder for a moment. Would a woman really want to have every guy after her? She would have to consider that this would include bankers, politicians, cab drivers, porn stars, computer tech line support, and Rush Limbaugh.
All jokes aside, I do think that this is a worthwhile and entertaining read. It is filled with humorous anecdotes, advice on fashion, instructions for performing a strip tease, and the simple message that men weren’t just put on this earth to want women. They are here to want one woman, and by the grace of the deity of your choice, I hope it’s you (not that you need them)!
“It’s not about making someone else happy or them making you happy. You have to be satisfied and happy with yourself and your own life – you have to feel whole. When you feel whole you will automatically put out the type of energy which will also attract a person that they themselves are whole. Thus, two wholes can come together and form a greater whole – this is far more powerful than two parts trying to make but a single whole.” – Hayden ext. 5424
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