We’ve recently heard a lot about the douche bags of the world: Tiger Woods, Jesse James, David Boreanaz. We’re constantly subjected to rants about how men can’t be trusted, think with their penises, are all cheaters, and so on. Actually, the latest studies show that women are just as likely to cheat, but that they do a much better job in covering it up. We also have to remember who these guys cheated with! I think that most of these women knew perfectly well what they were doing, and simply didn’t have a problem sleeping with a married man, just as they didn’t have a problem trying to make money off of their affairs or even trying to blackmail the guys they slept with. When it comes to getting the person they want, women are much more cunning than men.
Women have a much bigger arsenal, and therefore do more damage. We tend to be rather intuitive – we sense how others feel, and we tend to have people confide in and open up to us. So when a woman decides to go over to the dark side, it gets bad! Women will hit below the belt and use anything and everything to hurt their target. They tend to be much more deliberate (and sneaky) in their delivery. Whereas guys get into brawls, women go public and write nasty things in public forums. We’re passive aggressive, and we often don’t confront people directly at all. Guys bust in noses. We bust in reputations.
What makes women rather lethal is our unwillingness to forgive and move on. When bad things happen to us, we are usually more able to articulate our emotions, and therefore we are perfect in making excuses and justifying even our most despicable behaviors. Men bottle things up. We spew them out to the world. Maybe we play the victim better, so that when we tell our sob stories, others tend to buy into it. Support of one’s bad behaviors leads to more of the same, and I know many who are quite skilled in getting continuous buy-in from those who are more than willing to agree on how bad they have had it or still have it.
But not all is lost, and we do have advantages over men. We do tend to be more willing to work on ourselves. Hence, females tend to end up in therapy or in some kind of self-help class. We generally can admit when we need help much easier than a man, and we aren’t too proud to go get it. Plus, we are often more open minded and willing to try out unconventional methods, i.e. trying hypnotherapy or consulting the tarot. Sometimes our compassion can be our biggest asset, namely when we realize that what we are doing is mean, spiteful or crazy. We are more likely to get fed up with craziness earlier, and it tends to be women who break the cycles in crazy families, much more so than men.
I think that when we take a look at the latest douche bags in the public eye, we should remember that they didn’t commit the douchery on their own, but had some willing participants. And checking out Jesse James’ fling, Michelle McGee, I’m probably in the company of many when I say “Yeah, that chick is an equally large douche bag.” Let’s just remember that the bad apples reside in both genders!