Speak Up: Your Intuition is Telling You It’s Over

Are you distant, do you feel insecure, no longer loved, do you second guess your partner’s actions or motives, or have you lost trust? Maybe you’ve grown apart. Trust your intuition as to what’s happening in your relationship.

Trust Your Inner Relationship Coach

Molly from Athens, Georgia asks:

How do you know things are ending when you’re not seeing it?

Dear Molly,

You know it in your gut and you know by observing your behavior and his behavior. Finally, you know it based on how you feel. Are you distant, do you feel insecure, no longer loved, do you second guess your partner’s actions or motives, or have you lost trust? Have you become merely roommates, do you no longer share your lives, but instead spend more and more time alone? All of these are indicators that things are fizzling out. And while you can often fix a relationship that may have become stale, it requires work and commitment on both sides. The best indicator that things are done is when neither party is any longer interested and committed to make the necessary changes that would be required to safe the relationship.

Honesty is a great policy, so if you’re suspecting that something is up, simply ask your partner how they feel. The fact that you asked this question makes me wonder if you haven’t already realized that maybe things aren’t so great anymore. Also, ask people who really know you. An outsider is often able to see a situation for what it truly is, given that they do not have an emotional attachment to it. So ask a good friend what they are seeing.

“The only person you can change is yourself. Learn to accept others as they are or move on.” – Rivers ext. 5273

The one thing I cannot recommend is keeping your eyes firmly shut and looking the other way. That approach always ends up in disappointment and heartache. Keep your chin up and simply ask yourself, as well as the one you are with what is going on.

Good luck!

“Change is always to be welcomed rather than feared because it leads to the best relationship choices and the greatest freedom.” – Faith ext. 9608

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5 thoughts on “Speak Up: Your Intuition is Telling You It’s Over

  1. Chrissi Matusevics

    or they have taken responsibility, as I know I no longer am ‘in love’ with my husband- I care about him though and I know he loves me and I would never want to hurt him as I know he needs me as well and we have a son, who although he is now 20 would be better off with a stable home- I wish I had left when he ‘played away’ and fathered a daughter now, but I stayed- and now the only person I would have gone off with has passed on- we have a lot less in common now than we did when we first met- and married and I do wonder if I mistook love for lust on my side, anyway as when I heard that this other man had passed I literally felt torn apart although we had kept away from each other for over twenty two years- mainly because the bride his brother had married for him, and brought from India was not westernised nor au fait with the western world, and was terrified of her situation, but I heard from a cousin he had never stopped loving me till the day he died- and I now realise- nor did I but I now hope that if the greater powers are kind we will be together in our next lives- with no messups

  2. Anne

    What if you’re stuck? You no longer love each other but depend on each other. I’m not to proud about it but I’m financially dependent on him. I have nowhere else to go. No family or friends. I left everything to be with him and now I’m unemployed sitting at home ironing his shirts. It’s beyond shameful. But he’s also dependent on me to make him look good like as if he got it all. He’s well established and has everything together. I’m no envious but I do realize that none of anything is really mine. Not the house that I’m living in or even the bed I’m sleeping in. He doesn’t feel like he’s my b/f. Just a stranger that I’ve learned to cope with just to survive this economic downfall and my own demise. I’m just hanging on hoping for better. Can you give someone like me advice or have a blog entry on such situation?

  3. Yvette

    Wow. You’re. Reading. About is it over was so much feeling I have been going through that feeling for. About 2 mouths now thanks Yvette.

  4. Marc from the UK

    I like the article, however i would say that it is always not that black and white, sometimes people avoid dealing with the outcome of the situation as they fear change, or hurting others, and the reality that financially some people just cannot move on so they avoid the issue. I like the parr where you ask people to have a friend give an honest appraisal, they are always available.


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