Old Love Made New
Love can be hard work. Courtship and dating are a lot of fun, and the honeymoon period is to die for, but those times can’t last forever in a relationship. Eventually, all couples have to face the real work of being in a relationship, and sometimes, the romance can fizzle out. Maybe you’ve moved to a new city, and the adjustment is taking its toll. Perhaps one of you has lost their job, and the stress and financial burden has taken over, or you both just think there’s nothing more to talk about, and you’re bored. But love is a resilient thing, and only needs a small boost to reignite. Here are some tips on how to rekindle the romance in your life and give your love new spark.
- Use Your Words to Build Up the Relationship – Our words are powerful. Think about it; what means more in a relationship than hearing your partner say, “I love you” for the first time? Words don’t lose their power just because you’ve been together for a long time. They can hurt, they can encourage, and they can heal, and they’re a good place to start if you’re looking for a way to rekindle your romance with your partner. Tell them you love them more or compliment them in an area of their lives that you normally wouldn’t. Talk to them about your day, or the challenges you’re facing, and invite them to confide in you in the same way. Opening those line of communication creates a new intimacy and connection that may have been missing from your relationship, or you may have lost over the years. Even if you don’t think you’re very good with words, trust that your partner will understand what you’re trying to say, will reciprocate, and will help you build something beautiful again.
- Be Affectionate with Each Other – For most couples, touch is just as important for rekindling the romance as encouraging and loving words. And yes, while sex is usually a large part of that equation, smaller actions are just as important. An encouraging squeeze of the hand, a cuddle on the couch, even just a gentle caress as one of you passes by go a long way to show your partner that you enjoy their touch and their presence in your life.
- Put Effort into Your Relationship – If you’ve been together for a while, it’s easy to fall into a routine that feels comfortable. It’s also easy to stop putting any effort into your relationship when you both feel so comfortable with each other, but that can contribute to dampening the spark. If you’re looking to rekindle the romance, try dressing up a little nicer in your everyday life, or cook more meals at home together rather than doing a frozen dinner or take out. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to throw all of your comfortable loungewear away, because comfort after a hard day or when you’re stressed is extremely important for your mental well-being. Just don’t default to sweatpants all the time. When you were dating, you put effort into impressing each other. Remember what that was like and put some of that back into your existing relationship.
- Play to Your Strengths – They say opposites attract, so what was it about your partner that you loved at the beginning? As the years have gone by, have you both dampened those things that made you different people from each other? If so, let those opposite strengths shine again, because that’s part of you, and part of what made your partner love you in the first place. Rediscover your differences together, and allow those differences to help you fall in love all over again.
- Discover Something New About Your Partner – Even if you’ve been together for years, there’s still a chance you don’t know everything about your partner. What’s their favorite song right now? What’s their go-to snack at the office when the munchies hit at 3 PM? Your partner’s interests change—just like yours do—and taking an interest in their ever-evolving interests and tastes is the perfect way to reinvent your relationship.
- Create a New Ritual and Stick to It – What have you two always wanted to try as a couple? If you don’t know, do a bit of research and see what appeals to both of you. Once you’ve figured it out, give it a try. If you love it, commit to doing it once a week or once a month. Not only will it strengthen your bond, but it will also improve your communication and teach you to rely on each other again.
- Bring an Old Ritual Back – Instead of thinking up something new to do, you could resurrect something from your past. Was there something you and your partner used to do that really strengthened your bond? Why did you stop doing it? Would you like to do it again? Take your partner back to the old days when your love was new. Watch them get sentimental and they’ll fall in love with you all over again.
Give Love a Chance
We were made for emotional connection, and while those connections don’t always last, love is strong. Sometimes, a small spark is all you need to rekindle your relationship. What sparks your love for your partner?
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