Comedy careers have been made cracking jokes about married people wishing they were still single. After all, tying the knot spells the end of passion, right? Not if you don’t let it. Though it’s true that priorities shift after a couple has been together a while (and yes, nights in front of the TV are a lot more common than sweeping gestures made out on the town), there are definite perks to lifetime commitment. And some of them are a whole lot more romantic than those people cracking jokes would have you think. Here’s some ways to make more of your married life!
There’s a reason why finding love is one of our most powerful drives as human beings. No one wants to feel as if they’re entirely alone in the world. And in a happy marriage (which, let’s face it, includes downs as well as ups), you’re not ever alone – even when your spouse is away. The support you feel in a truly intimate partnership does more than buoy you in times of trouble. It provides a warm, fuzzy feeling of satisfaction that’s easy to overlook. So, if you want to make the most of your marriage, stop overlooking it!
Take a moment each day to be grateful for the person you married. It’s easy to get caught up in the things they do that annoy you, but you’ll find yourself a lot happier and more engaged if you focus instead on the ways they make you feel special – and supported. In addition, make sure to share your gratitude with your partner. A little acknowledgement goes a long way, particularly for people who have developed your kind of short hand.
Sexually speaking, it was fireworks at first sight. You felt like you saw god every time you did it – and that was a couple of times a day! The trouble is, life (work, kids, schedules, maintaining a house) takes a lot more energy than it did when you were dating. Now, you can barely keep your eyes open when you climb into bed at night – never mind your legs! Rather than beating yourself (or your relationship) up for what may have become a lackluster sex life (however temporarily), accept this basic truth. You aren’t going to have the energy for an extended session every night – but you can make time to cuddle on a regular basis. Sounds silly, but by engaging in full body contact, you’ll enhance your connection and increase the desire to make time for full-blown bedroom athleticism.
Meanwhile, appreciate the fact that you don’t feel the need to put on a show every time you enter the boudoir. One of the sexiest things about being married is that your spouse has seen you at your worst – and still wants to sleep with you!
Make Time to Please Each Other
Finally, while you should be grateful (and excited) to have someone else’s unconditional love, it’s vital that you don’t take your partner for granted. Set aside time each week to do something sweet (and sexy) for your spouse. Whether it’s planning an out of the house date, giving them a massage or unplugging for an hour to take a bubble bath together, these little gestures do a lot to bolster your connection – and increase your romance. Ideally, the closer you feel, the hotter your relationship will become. And even if the waves of passion ebb sometimes (which is bound to happen), they’ll always flow back in your direction.