Watch Your Language!
I hear it around me, I see it in my clients and, on occasion, in myself! It is the need to speak out and validate growing older and sharing the experience with others… sharing the limitations that seem to grow year by year. However as a behaviorist, I can tell you, that does not only accept that limitation… it is encouraging it to get worse!
The mind accepts the spoken word without much of a screening process, and it accepts thought as truth when we make statements like “I feel so old” or “My body aches every morning.” The brain takes these as “orders” from you!
So the most crucial step in this is to be ever vigilant about WHAT you say and think about yourself, and be very careful with what you program into your own behavior!
Here are the tools I teach to help with this:
1. Write a list of “negative thoughts and beliefs” you have about yourself. Now think of a counterweight to each of those and write the opposite — for instance, “I feel old” would have a positive counter of “I am learning to tune in to my youthful inner self.”
Think of the “negatives” as old tapes playing over and over, you can change those tapes, by stopping yourself the very second you realize you are doing it, and “pushing” the new positive though into your mind… it gets easier and easier as you do it and “re-record” over those old statements. You will notice that your brain responds and slowly you will “feel” more youthful and alive… try this for thirty days if you don’t believe me… its magic!
2. Talk to your body! Your body has cellular memory. Each ache, each pain has a type of “consciousness” that WILL respond to you. I have chronic pain issues, I talk to my body part and say, “I know you’re trying to let me know there’s something wrong. I do know, and am taking action (exercise, heat pads, medications) to help this, please turn down the volume on the pain signal you are sending to our brain.” It works.
3. Getting older can mean getting wiser, especially about ourselves, so identify things that you could be doing to bring more joy into your world. Figure out what stands between you and doing those things and make a “to do” list to take care of each thing, and a realistic time frame to have them done by.
4. Now set down these plans to a calendar, and make a weekly check in time. Take that day as a day to journal; your successes and the challenges of the past week. Note the upcoming plans that could be challenges in the next week and come up with possible solutions. These tools can produce miraculous changes and happiness!
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