Love & Commitment: Why You Haven’t Met His Friends Yet

Is He Going to Commit to You?

If you’ve been dating a guy for a while and he hasn’t introduced you to his friends, you’re probably wondering why. Maybe he doesn’t have true feelings for you. Maybe you aren’t “The One.” Maybe he is afraid of commitment. There are a host of reasons why he’s keeping you and his friends apart. Here’s six of them.

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He’s Commitment Phobic

If your guy is commitment phobic, chances are you know very little about him. That’s because he prefers to keep his work, family, friends and dates private. One will not know about the other. It keeps everyone and everything in its perfect place. If you want to know if your guy is commitment phobic, there are several signs to look out for, but a huge red flag would be making weak excuses to keep you from meeting his friends.

He’s Not That Interested in You

A man’s mind is often busy preparing itself for the future. If your guy isn’t curious to see how you’d get along with his family, co-workers and friends, chances are he really isn’t interested in you and he doesn’t see you in his future. It’s just easier to keep you separate so no one gets attached.

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He’s Afraid You’ll See the Real Him

There are many different sides to the man you’re seeing. There is the side that’s suitable for work; the side suitable for family; the side suitable for friends and the side suitable for your relationship. Of all these sides, the one that’s suitable for his friends is probably the most truthful. He could be hiding who he really is in order to get you to like him and keep you interested. This doesn’t mean he’s hiding some deep, dark secret. It could just mean that he isn’t ready to show you who he really is.

He Hasn’t Thought About it

Maybe the idea of introducing you to his friends hasn’t even crossed his mind. Or maybe he thinks you wouldn’t want to meet his friends. Or perhaps his friends’ opinions don’t matter. It all depends on how important his friends are to him, how often he sees them and if he relies on their opinions to make romantic decisions.

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He Doesn’t Have Any Close Friends

Some guys have a lot of close friends. Others have a few close friends, and there are others who are considered loners with a few acquaintances and no close friends. It’s good advice to be weary of a partner who has no or few friends, but go with your gut instinct on this one. Have you ever observed any behavior that would explain why he has no close friends? Or do you think he is a “player” and he’s just saying he doesn’t have close friends to keep you from discovering his antics?

He’s Protecting You

Perhaps he is protecting you from some of the people in his life. He may have a friend who is great fun to hang out with, but this same person could be crude, mean and rude to any woman who has the potential to take his friend away. If he’s protecting you from his friends, it’s because he’s learned his lesson with other ladies in the past. Maybe he doesn’t want his friends to chase you away.

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If you are wondering why your guy won’t introduce you to his friends, the best thing to do is to ask him. You can playfully suggest you all get together and see how he reacts. If the idea scares or annoys him, don’t be afraid to ask him why. And if he’s okay with it, maybe all he needed was for you to initiate the plans.

14 thoughts on “Love & Commitment: Why You Haven’t Met His Friends Yet

  1. Perp

    I m a 37 yrs old lady dating a 53yrd old man for almost 10mths.i have the key to his house but yet to meet his friends and even kids.he said he will not introduce me to his kids who are 23,20 and 11yrs old until he is extremely sure about me.when I asked him about meeting 1or 2 of his friends,he said he has no friends that he can introduce me to.yet this man will be on the phone talking to whoever and telling that he will go and have a shower soon or will eat before going to bed etc..He keeps saying he wants me to get pregnant for him yet he will not introduce me to anyone he cares about .

    Reply
  2. Dorothy Avila

    I was married to a man for 32 years we got divorce. Now he living with me and we r trying to make it work again so he say. Hes lived with for over a year now. He still hasnt told me he loves me yet even though we r trying to make it work again. How long is to long to wait for those three words I so want to hear from him.

    Reply
  3. Ted

    Why is this subject purely for women?men have the same problem with women,it is a two way street.Always remember that ladies.

    Reply
  4. ponygurl66

    <<<<>>>>>

    I like this one!!!
    when I met my boyfriend he hung out with a few guys….when we moved in with eachother… he distant himself from them……but not because of me……(more like he was secluding himself from life)

    I encourage him to have friends. Its not healthy to confine yourself in solitary. He has become more and more depressed, moody, and has a negative attitude about everything.

    If he would talk to someone….besides his mom…….he would get some release. but he prefers to keep everything bottled up inside…..just adding fuel to the fire…..and driving a wedge between us.

    I now realize that he was not completely showing his real self. I feel I was fooled.
    I think that anyone who doesn’t want friends, doesn’t want a relationship. because you have to want to be with someone….whether you’re wanting to be with someone…..or just talk n hang with someone. If you don’t be around others….don’t pretend you do…..because you owe it to that person to be REAL. if you don’t like others people……you don’t like yourself……and you’ll never be able to give a relationship everything it needs

    Reply
  5. Marc from the UK

    LOL Sarah Lindley

    I love your comments, have we also missed out here that sometimes people are also shy???

    However people that meet all the criteria are either a catch or married? Some people are choosing also to heal after being hurt through there behaviour, or someone else actions 😉

    Reply
  6. Henrietta Fridman

    My ex boyfriend didn’t introduce me to his friends because he had a girlfriend among those friends.he had me and her . I had to break up with him after I found out.unfortunately I fell on love with him . I took it very hard.

    Reply
  7. Sara Lindley

    Love and Comments: Why you haven’t met his friends.

    Is he going to commit to you?
    I don’t understand why women torture themselves with this question. You have been given a life. Live it! If he decides to bond with you then you decide if he should. It’s YOUR choice. Don’t stand around whimpering waiting for him to commit. Pull up your big girl panties and LIVE!

    He’s commitment phobic.
    This is an excuse. All humans commit to something or someone every day. You commit yourself when you get your butt out of bed in the morning to subconsciously committing to rise again the next day. We all commit ourselves every single day. If he can’t decide to bond with you…you don’t want a man who can’t make a decision on his own. He needs to quit playing with dolls and grow up.

    He’s not that interested in you.
    Nuff said. If he doesn’t want commitment…you don’t need him. Life can bring heavy trials and you don’t need some self-absorbed malcontent as your partner in life.

    He’s afraid to see the real him?
    He’s afraid? He doesn’t commit because you might see just what kind of man he is? Boy! Giant red flag here girls! Don’t just walk away, pick up your purse and …RUN!

    He hasn’t thought about it?
    Well that pretty much lets you know that this lack wit is not the kind of man to be your life’s partner. He needs to wake up and smell the coffee. These are grown men we are talking about here ladies! Believe me…he’s thought about it and it went through his mind like crap through a goose. Throw this one back in the barnyard.

    He doesn’t have any close friends?
    GIANT red flag! If he doesn’t commit because he doesn’t have any close friends…he is NOT going to be close to you! This is a person who is either a Mr. Hyde or he never learned to play well with others and still runs with scissors.

    He’s protecting you?
    If he’s protecting you from his friends he is untrustworthy. His choice of friends shows his ability to pick a posse that is honorable and reliable. If you have not met his friends…they either aren’t really friends and he doesn’t trust them, he doesn’t trust YOU, or he doesn’t trust himself. TRUST is the issue here. Do you want to have someone like that waking up next to you? Move on ladies.

    Reply
  8. Paula

    I have one close friend, being 54, I have experienced many, many fake friendships that only wound up taking advantage of ME! I choose to not have “friends”, the ones I thought were my friends were never there when I needed them. I generally am a happy person, but I don’t like people. I am friendly to all but friends are not all they are thought to be?

    Reply
  9. lydia

    i have a boyfriend of which i have never see or hear talking to a friend bt he keep on saying he do have them.is he hiding something orprotecting me

    Reply

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