I recently had the privilege to speak with Charles Orlando, the author of the book The Problem With Women… is Men. A reformed ladies’ man, Charles now writes about the immaturity of men and how women need to take back their power. In the first segment of our interview, here, Charles discussed the path of the Evolved Man, and how women are responding to his book. (You can read the first part of the interview here.) In the second, we discussed the changing gender dynamics in today’s world and how women are stepping up to the plate. (You can read the second part of the interview here.)
In the final part of our interview, we asked – where does Charles feel that we are moving in terms of gender roles in society?
“I don’t think we’re moving fast enough,” he replies. “I do feel that there have been some amazing strides from both genders, but if we have to tell the whole truth, the goal for the book and my fan page is to never have a fan. The reason I’m able to sell books and have so many fans on my pages, which is 99% female, is because there are so many women who are tired of being treated the way they are being treated by men, across the board, when it comes to simple interactions, dating, marriage, children, all of that. They’re very unhappy, and could this be a case of them wanting more constantly? Sure, that’s what people do. Men get very comfortable, and set in what they feel are their ways, whereas women always want more. Do I feel we’re headed down a path? Sure. Are we headed there fast enough? I don’t think so, personally. What I’ve painfully observed in a variety of locations around the country… is how women are dissatisfied with the current state of their relationships, and how men passive-aggressively refuse to pony up past the initial dating cycle.”
What was Charles’ personal journey like?
“Well, I definitely had an endgoal in mind when I was out to meet women each night. I wanted to bring somebody home. A lot of players like that play the numbers game. You ask 50 women for sex and you get shot down by 49. And you find one who goes ‘OK’… That was never my game. It was always the chase, I was always the hunter… when I met my wife 20 years ago (we were high school sweethearts, but the first 5 years of our relationship were troubled to say the least, [it was] teenage love). We were on again, off again. Whenever she broke up with me, I would go off whoring, and then she’d call me back and I’d dump whoever I was with. The real catalyst for my epiphany was that I had found the path to successful sex, but not to a real friend and companion. I never looked at my wife as a spouse. Spouses are cheated on, they’re betrayed. People don’t do that to their friends. So I’ve always looked at her as a friend and a companion that I happen to be married to. And I knew that on that path, the man that I was then wasn’t the man that was going to be able to make a relationship successful over the long term. It was nothing she could do, but it was all me. It was something I had to resolve within my self. So I did a lot of thinking, I did a lot of talking to those around me. I grew up in a broken home, with a father who was… faithfulness-challenged. I didn’t want to be like that. [Eventually] I got to a place where I was comfortable with who I was. So that’s when my wife and I ended up hooking back up and making a real run of it, 15 years ago. And it’s constant. I’m still a disaster area, I’m just potentially further along the path than those who maybe haven’t started yet.”
If Charles could perfectly sum up his message, what would it be?
“The world of men is a noisy, whirling vortex of testosterone-laden bull—t. If men could back up from themselves and see themselves as women see us, it would be blindingly obvious why divorce rates are up, why kids’ grades are down and why the women we claim to love are taking enough antidepressants it would put even Keith Richards in a drunken stupor.”