How to Ask Your Crush Out

The Delicate Art of Turning a Crush Into a Date

There are two approaches to this question. If you are shy, you may be wondering how you can ask someone out without experiencing the embarrassment or grief of taking a chance. On the other hand, you may have the courage, but lack a good track record, and are beginning to wonder if you have the right technique. Regardless of which pair of shoes you stand in, you’re in luck, as the answer is fundamentally the same.

I think there are many creative ways to introduce yourself to someone when you’re shy. You could write a message in a bottle, create a website, or draw up a treasure map and have them go on a treasure hunt to find you seated in their favorite coffee shop. While I do believe there is a place for creativity and the accidental flirt, the most impact you will have on a crush is during face-to-face contact. If that thought has sent shivers up and down your spine, don’t worry, we’ll be addressing that.

Disguise Your Introduction as a Favor

A successful date is not only getting your crush to say yes, but getting them to make an investment. One of the best ways to do this is to create a scenario where they’re giving to the relationship before it even starts. This signals to their brain that this is something important. In this definition, an introductory date could consist of helping you with a copy machine that is jammed, or directions to a nearby ATM. People love to help others, and it will make the likelihood of them saying yes to a date even greater. Not that your chances are that bad, considering most research suggests one out of two guys (one out of three women) will readily agree to a first date.

Don’t Over Evaluate Your Body Cues

The body is a wonderful machine. It is designed to monitor emotional and physiological changes, and then protect itself in the face of danger. When you walk up to a crush, get freaked out, turn around and walk away, you are allowing yourself to listen to this biology, which is saying, “I’m feeling scared. Get me out of here.” When it comes to asking out a crush, you need to learn to ignore these messages. A good technique is to focus on your intent (thoughts), rather than your body’s reaction to your fear.

“A true love partner is possible, together you and your psychic can seek the required groundwork.” – TeriLynn ext. 9625

Be Specific

Part of asking out a crush is often being slightly unsure. This leads to the common questions, “Would you like to go out sometime?”, or “Perhaps we could have lunch some day?” Why not remove the hesitation, and make plans for now. Even if they are busy during the time you suggest, having made the stronger initiative will pay off by encouraging them to make alternative plans. So if you say, “Let’s grab a cup of coffee after work” and they’re busy, they will be more likely to reply, “I can’t today, but how about tomorrow?”

Be Available, But Barely

Turning the tables on a crush can be difficult. There are a lot of chemical things going on in your brain that are making you feel all goofy and tingly inside. This puts you at a disadvantage because you are the most invested person at that moment, and have the most to lose. In other words, your crush is just fine with your current, non-existent relationship, and you’re the one who wants to change that. Of course, it is possible that the other person could have a crush on you too. However, if they don’t, you’ll need to encourage one. People value things most after they’ve been taken away. With this in mind, go ahead and make yourself available, and then become slightly scarce. When your crush decides to seek you out, you’ll have a much easier time finding the courage to ask them on a date.

“Enjoy a date without worrying if your date is ‘the one.'” – Maryanne ext. 9146

Reward Them for Saying Yes

Reward a crush for saying yes by doing your homework and choosing an activity you know they’ll enjoy. Just remember that every relationship is a two-way street. You have extended a kindness, and now it is their turn to return the favor. One of the biggest differences between a crush and committed relationships is equality. If you allow yourself to fall into the position where you’re giving your crush everything in return for nothing, they may take advantage of this, and you’ll never get your own needs met.

To sum up this article in one sentence, the key to rounding up a crush will be in your ability to entice by reward, and then win them over after encouraging them to bargain for your continued attention.

“If your love life is not alive with support, happiness and appreciation, seek the ‘why’ and ask your psychic.” – TeriLynn ext. 9625

11 thoughts on “How to Ask Your Crush Out

  1. Leslie

    Laughin My Butt Of @ Bob??!! That Is 2 Cute & Funny, I Pray God Find U The Lady Of Ur Desire’s & Dreams In Jesus Name Blood & Luv!!

    Reply
  2. kat

    What is a date these days? Been off the dating scene for 30plus years. Want to get back on the horse but don’t even know how to ride anymore!

    Reply
  3. shelley

    I did that. Asked a guy out and had a good time and played it totally right, only a goodbye kiss. we had been talking for 2 months prior to the event and had a great time and everything changed after the date. I had to tell him I knew I was being played in which he apologized and we never spoke again. THAT IS THE LAST TIME I ASK A GUY OUT

    Reply
  4. Joanna

    Johnny,

    Don’t give up hope, but be open to the other angelic women out there looking for someone like you. And pray, pray, pray…

    Love,

    Joanna

    Reply
  5. Hassiba x5818

    Great ideas! Asking someone has to be one of my least favorite things to do in life. So I’m grateful for advice that helps me get out of my head (filled with anxiety) and out on a date!

    Reply
  6. Noah Body

    Think Bob’s analogy is pretty off the wall…

    The blog was very well handled on how to go about asking someone you have a crush with on a date.
    Kudos on mentioning getting something in return so you don’t fall into the possilibity of being taken advantage of.

    Reply
  7. johnny

    i have a crush on a beautiful woman and she is a smart and very sexy lady ,she is rich and set for life but has a personality that when you look into her eyes you know you can love her for life,because her kindness is so sweet and her yoga teaching is also kind ,she beats me health and her beauty is is so much sexier than mine but when we were in the pool we were so close to each other and i was getting solo yoga classes and her beauty and laughter was touching my heart ,then she got to busy to give me solo classes ,now i havent seen her but her beauty is so good she is a big writer and her kindness is beautiful,i saw her on a date site and left her a message to give me a chance to show her i can be the man for her,i had not heard nothing from her but i do want to see if i can bump into her ,i have had positive thinking to bump into her ,it will happen and i am going to keep my heart and mind open with out making a fool of myself,i know she out weighs me by alot but my respect,kindness,love ,being kind and improving my life after getting hit by a bull i am positive but if this fails i will continue to find my love ,i know i can make her happy with kindness and love,i am not rich but take care of myself,i am a good man,should i leave her be or should i let her know my love and emotions i have for her,

    Reply
  8. Kristin

    To Bob,that’s a good analogy.I never thought of it like that.So true.You can’t turn a crush into a date and vise versa.Accept the situation for what it is while going after what you really want. 🙂

    Reply
  9. Bob

    I think this is a water into wine question…
    changing Crush into a date
    it may be impossible since Crush is an orange drink
    and a date is another totally different fruit
    since I don’t care for dates I would prefer to turn my Crush into a Blend
    and besides that i don’t really think drinking dates would taste as good as drinking orange juice you can’t buy
    a bottle of date juice can you at any giant beagle or other store so i am assuming changing dates into something to drink would not work that would be the same as changing Crush into a fig and you don’t drink fig juice either
    Personally I’d rather just keep the Crush
    and just eat my date

    Reply

Leave a Reply to johnny Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *