Getting Over Emotionally Unavailable Men
In a perfect world, we would all enter the dating field knowing and projecting exactly what we’re looking for, with an abundance of confidence and clarity. In reality, dating frequently resembles a convoluted journey full of mishaps, frustration and disappointment until we find the “one” we happily decide to settle down with. If you find yourself always playing a role in your relationships that leaves you unsatisfied and ultimately alone, take a closer glimpse into what you’re exuding to attract these “lost cause” partners. For now, let’s take a look at a few reasons why some women consistently slip into the role of “the rebound girl.”
Generally, dating a man who is not over his ex is dating an emotionally unavailable one. Even if he has feelings for you, they’re clouded by his emotional inability to move on from his previous relationship. If you find yourself in this situation more than once, you may want to look at your ability to commit. If you have a fear of committed relationships, pursuing men who are emotionally unavailable can feel safe to you. This tactic allows you to date men without ever truly risking your heart.
Some women spend all of their energy trying to be everything to the man they are dating. Similar to the Geisha—a Japanese woman raised from birth to learn how to be the perfect woman to a man in every way—some women sacrifice their very feelings and happiness to keep a man in her life. If he has not emotionally moved on from his previous relationship, your selfless patience with his closed-off heart and accompanying behavior, places you precisely in the role of the rebound girl. Where most women would high-tail it out of that dead-end relationship, you choose to stick around and try to be whatever he needs, compromising your feelings and needs for his. This can only lead to your resentment, his disrespect, and ultimate emotional disaster.
A Little Self-Respect, Please
This is where your self-confidence comes into play. You have to believe that you deserve a mate who is completely into you and what the two of you have together. With self-respect, you will not allow yourself to be taken advantage by a lonely guy who’s still pining after his previous sweetheart. All relationships are a balance, and a healthy one is comprised of two people equally committed and focused on bringing happiness into each other’s lives. Do yourself a favor and leave the brokenhearted beaus to heal while you set your sights on the ones ready and willing to commit to someone new.