Are You Communicating Properly?
Relationships are hard. Marriage is even harder. But there are some basic communication errors that we all slip into that, if we became more mindful of, would could circumvent. Yes, it actually does all come down to how mindful we are about our interactions with our partner!
The Huffington Post reports:
With all the celebrity breakups lately, many of us are debating, deliberating, and calculating the numerous reasons marriages fail. We all speculate whether it’s the usual suspects such as infidelity, discrepancy over finances, midlife crisis, or growing apart that leads to the majority of splits.
Obviously there is no simple answer to what causes the millions of breakups and divorces – both Hollywood and pedestrian – that occur every year. In actuality, there are hundreds of reasons why relationships end, and everyone has a unique story to tell. But researchers do point to five unexpected behaviors that if repeated over time, can cause permanent damage to any couple’s love bond.
Engaging in these five behaviors can sink a marriage:
1. Nagging: Nagging is a frustrating dance that many of us fall prey to. It can be defined as one partner repeatedly making requests to the other, who regularly ignores it. The Wall Street Journal calls this type of communication “toxic”, and experts say it can eventually sink a relationship. When repeated nagging occurs, I call it a “Death by 1000 Paper Cuts”. Men and women both nag, but apparently women do it more. Nagging can be potentially as dangerous to a marriage as infidelity.
2. Criticism: Repeatedly attacking your partner’s personality or character rather than focusing on the actual behavior that bothers you and discussing it in a mature and effective manner.
3. Contempt: Attacking your partner’s sense of self with the intention of causing harm. Openly disrespecting him or her. This includes name calling and cursing, hostile behavior or body language (such as eye rolling), and putting your partner down.
(Click through to the article for the other two mistakes.)
What do you think—what’s the best way to keep positive communication in your partnership?
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