4 Ways Not to Propose Marriage

Things to Avoid, Especially During the Holidays

It’s that time of the year again, the time when wedding proposals are at their peak. Surveys suggest that somewhere around a quarter of all soon-to-be grooms will be popping the question between Thanksgiving and New Year’s. There’s actually nothing wrong with any proposal idea, provided it’s something that will be special to your sweetie. However, any proposal can backfire if it’s ill-planned, and there are certain ideas that can be a little more treacherous than others, such as the following five (not so) great proposal ideas. You might be an unhappy groom if you choose to propose to your sweetie…

1. At the Jewelry Store With the Grumpy Holiday Shoppers as Your Primary Witnesses

Countless women have complained about their boyfriend proposing in the jewelry store, as he is purchasing the ring. This moment usually comes to a climax with the words “Wanna wear it?” A lot of guys don’t really know how to pop the question, and while getting the ring may seem to be as good of time as any. Most women have dreamed of this moment ever since they were little girls. They probably imagined their Prince Charming bent on one knee, among a forest of fairies and unicorns, as they blushed with glee. You don’t have to do anything as extravagant as this, but do wait until you can surprise her with something a little more romantic than… 6 crying kids, 5 disgruntled customers, 4 grumpy men, 3 crying parents, 2 teenage love birds, and a… mall Santa in a cardboard sleigh!

2. At the Family Holiday Party (or, Worse Yet, the Office Holiday Party)

Tradition says that it is a great idea to share your proposal with the entire family. However, under some circumstances, a bride would rather share the moment in private, and then tell everybody about it afterward at the party. Asking her on the spot, in front of an audience, can be a lot of pressure, especially if she’s not expecting it. This kind of a situation can lead to a false-positive answer, hard feelings in the relationship, and a double downer to the mood once granny brings out the fruit cake platter.

“Relationships magnify the human experience.” – Quinn ext. 5484

3. On Christmas/Hanukkah Day

This idea can be a grand slam for the women who love the holidays. However, it can also backfire for the ones who see this time of the year as an overly commercialized excuse to go into more debt. Some women like to think of their proposal as a special day in its own right. They don’t want it to compete with anyone else, including the headless horsemen, Saint Nick, Saint Valentine, the Lucky Charms guy, or their friend Valerie, whose boyfriend happens to propose on the same day. A majority of breakups occurs this time of the year, and your chances of joining these statistics increase if your proposal begins with, “I couldn’t think of anything to get you, so I got you this ring.” Some women see a Christmas/Hanukkah proposal as an excuse not to buy her that Cuisinart she’s been asking for. Others see it as a way to steal from the magic of the season, adding sparkle to an otherwise drab proposal. And if you think this sounds petty, you’ve never seen a bridezilla in action.

4. On a Sleigh Ride in the Middle of 500 Tons of Fresh Snow

This recommendation is also sometimes known as the KISS principle (Keep It Simple Stupid). Not that you’re stupid, but you may have a few choice words about yourself, if you plan a hike up Pike’s Peak (Colorado) to deliver the ring on sunset, and end up getting trapped by fog and frigid temperatures. She ends up getting every finger frostbit, particularly the one with her new ring that was too tight, because it hadn’t been sized yet. When you’re dealing with lots of white stuff, sub-zero temperatures, and the playful nature of Jack Frost, keep your creativity limited to such atmosphere as a clean carpet, a comfortable couch, and a cozy warm fire. Nothing says a stressful holiday like a lost heirloom engagement ring.

“You must first decide that you are worthy of love and that your value to be loved is not determined by someone else but yourself.” – William ext. 5131

Ultimately, the best proposal depends on the girl it’s being delivered to. Some may think these ideas sound as sweet as can be, while others would have your head on a fruitcake platter. My best advice is to know your bride-to-be before you propose over the holidays. If you aren’t sure how she will react, perhaps you don’t know her as well as you should!

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2 thoughts on “4 Ways Not to Propose Marriage

  1. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Funny, Eric…..but true enough !

    ” 6 crying kids, 5 disgruntled customers, 4 grumpy men, 3 crying parents, 2 teenage love birds, and a… mall Santa in a cardboard sleigh” !

    Loved the line from the above article …..LOL LOL

  2. Kimberley

    Absolutely you should know your girl. The guy I was with proposed on the dock in front of drunken friends on a typical Saturday night by standing in front of me, displaying this pathetically small (cheap) ring and asking me if I wanted to marry him. I had never intended on marrying the guy but I didn’t want him to be embarassed in front of all HIS friends so I HAD to say yes. Needless to say, a couple months later we went our separate ways.


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