Right Guy, Wrong Relationship?
I have been in a friends-with-benefits relationship for almost two years. We do all kinds of things together—with and without our children. We have even vacationed together with our kids. Our other friends think we’re in a relationship, but he says we’re just friends and nothing else. I’m not sure if this is the right relationship for me.
We’ve been there for each other and help one another out when we’re in a pinch. He’s been married and divorced twice, with one child from each marriage, and I have two children from my previous marriage.
Is he scared to be in a relationship with me? Do I just move on in search of the right relationship? I’m in love with him, but a lot of my friends are saying just let him go if he doesn’t want you. But something about him makes me want to stay. Will we ever have a romantic, serious relationship? Am I asking too much from him? Does he have the same feelings for me?
He has started in the past that we act like an old married couple. So why can’t we make this the right relationship for both of us?
Psychic Kallista ext. 9623 responds:
You have a difficult choice in front of you. If you’re willing to remain with him just as things are, he’ll stick around for some time. However, if you try to urge him to commit, it will only result in fighting and a potential breakup.
You ask if you are in the right relationship. If it’s a true commitment you’re seeking, then I’m sorry to say the answer is no, you’re not in the right relationship. He lost his last two marriages by making his ex-wives feel the same way he makes you feel: disposable.
The holdup is a result of his deep fear of losing his independence. His fear is rooted in selfishness. He swore to himself that he would never marry again and that he would not open his heart to love. His needs matter to him more than anyone’s, including yours. He is aware of how he is treating you, and he is conscious and deliberate in his hurtful behavior. In spite of this, he does feel love for you, but your capacity to love is far greater than his.
You are giving so much, but you feel you are getting crumbs in return. Your anxiety feels like it is growing due to constant uncertainty, and it’s causing you a lot of pain. You are a loving mother, and you’re concerned about how he’s making your children feel, too. They sense the insecure feeling he is creating for all of you. While therapy can often work wonders, especially with communication issues, there’s something in him that will not yield to having a conventional, traditional relationship with anyone at this time.
Nikki, I believe all things are possible, but it appears that the misery you’re experiencing will only deepen the longer you stay. You are a queen, and the decision is yours, but if you choose to walk away, it won’t be long until you find the right relationship.
Wishing you the very best,
There’s nothing worse than romantic uncertainty, but you don’t have to navigate the ebbs and flows of love alone. A love psychic is always available to help and a psychic love reading is exactly what you need to get your relationship on the path to forever.
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