Unlike professional firings where you collect your final paycheck, grab your things and are escorted out by security, firing a friend is more of a lengthy and painful process. Growing up and facing reality makes us realize what’s working in our lives and what’s not. I’m a firm believer that we are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with and every so often it’s necessary to do a spring cleaning of our lives. Letting go can be the hardest thing to do in life, however, it’s the healthiest thing we can learn so we better ourselves and get to the places we want to go.
Currently, I’m in a rather large growth spurt, I’m feeling the natural push to distance myself from certain friends that have been in my life for a long time. They have given me so many great memories and fun times, but I’m realizing they have also been a detriment to me reaching my goals and dreams. It’s important to always check yourself and make sure you have the right people surrounding you. Not to sound harsh, but when people no longer are a benefit to your life, it’s time to detach and let go. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t grab a drink or some food with them from time to time, but things can’t go on as they have been. The main reason for this is no matter how close a friend it is, people can become toxic to you at any given moment without warning because we as people are constantly growing and changing. What we wanted yesterday isn’t the same thing we want today.
Firing friends that are toxic is an essential part of coming of age and growing up. If you take the right perspective on it, you’ll realize that this is also necessary in order to make room for new people to come into your life. People that will inspire you, and you feel you connect with better depending on what point in life you are at. Again, this comes down to detachment and being in touch with yourself and defining what you want out of life. Detachment may seem harsh to some people, but in the end, once you master this process, you’ll find yourself much happier, much healthier, and fulfilled.
2 thoughts on “Time to Fire Your Friends”
I am SOOO glad i read this article! As soon as I read the second paragraph,I KNEW I had made the right decision to “fire”, not once,but twice my former closest internet friend,Kelly. Talk about toxic ! She had threatened me the first go -around,then played mind games with me the next time she attempted to befriend me. I had met her in another forum,Yahoo Answers, when I had posted an answer about Heath Ledger’s death. That started a friendship that I had had major red flags to begin with. I did not follow my gut instincts,and now I’m wishing I had.
Those red flags continued til I had fired her the first and second time.
But I also learned a few good things from her: like how to tune into my gut and intuitiveness.
Great article !!
This was such a great and honest article.
I so understand what you are feeling. Believe me.
And you are 110% right.
If we feel that we are always being, “Knocked down a few notches”-it’s time to distance ourself. Nobody wants to be brought down every time they talk to a friend, or, minimized.
Our friends should be honest, but yet, do appreciate and verbalize our talents and great qualities. And, when this stops, we feel, “Drained, beat up and compromised.” And the core? No respect.
Believe me, most of them know what they are doing. So what is left? Well, either they don’t care what you think, or, they underestimate the intelligence of a human being….Big mistake a lot of people make. It shows when a person thinks they are “smarter” than yourself. No fun, either.
When the “fun” stops, also, that is another key-
But what you wrote here is right on. May I make a suggestion, please? See if any of them come forward and apologize. There could possibly be a chance…..But they need to wake up and start showing some respect!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. This was just excellent.
Miss Krystal