In the 37 years since I began doing professional psychic readings,(yes, I did start very young), the #1 question most often asked is: “How can you tell when a great love affair has finally run its course?” The answer to this dilemma varies greatly from one person to another, but there seems to be some universal factors.
In each case, one or both people recognize each other from a past life. They may not know the exact placement of who the person was “before” or what role they played at the time, they may not even believe in past lives, but there is an unstoppable passion that seems to challenge all practical and common sense. The energy that flows between them is the stuff of legend and it is as chemical and addicting as any drug. “Therein lies the rub!” as the Immortal Bard would say. Just like any drug, too much can destroy everything. The same applies to great passions.
When a person recognizes their passionate connection with someone, many things begin to synchronize. First, there is the originality and spontaneity of the situation. Often the love affair or attraction is taking place at a time when many of life’s more “mundane” issues have taken over the quest for personal expansion and growth. Quite often the romance is in the realm of forbidden temptation: one or both people are married to others. Another focus is that the one who is most “stricken” by this passion is often feeling very miserable and unloved in their current situations, thus opening the door for many things that may feel like a rescue from their present woes. Enter the “soulmate.”
In one lifetime, we have many, many “soulmates.” These are fellow travelers who are here to help us develop in ways that would be impossible at any other stage or time. Some soulmates repel us keeping us from making serious mistakes that would be made by going in the wrong direction. Have you ever met anyone with whom you had an instant dislike? That person was, indeed, a soulmate. How about the person who, in an instant, makes you feel like you have known them your entire life? That person, too, is a soulmate. They will assist you in other areas of life’s journey. Then there are the ones who take your breath away. Those are the ones we are focusing on right now. Those are the ones who can either warm the house or burn it to the ground.
If you find yourself being drawn to someone and the relationship is very damaging or potentially dangerous, ask yourself one question: if this was a situation involving my best friend, how would I advise them? If the answer is “Get your things and RUN!” you have your answer. If you are putting far more energy and time INTO the relationship than you are getting out, the answer is very simple: end this madness before more bad things happen! Being alone is NOT the end of the world, especially if you are really working on making the world better for others instead of focusing all your time on yourself. If, however, you are addicted to drama and simply want to have a miserable, albeit, passionate lifestyle, then proceed at your own risk.
When you ask your psychic for help in determining whether or not things are going to get better in your relationship, try to keep your expectations out of the reading. Many “false” readings are created by the unyielding intentions of the querant onto the psychic impressions that the reader is trying to gather. Do not ask a question if you do not want the answer. If the answer is not what you want to hear, please try to accept it. Going to dozens of readers until you find one who will give you the answer you want to hear is not only unfair to yourself, it simply sets you up for a greater disappointment when things don’t transpire as you want. In the South we have an expression: “If 50 people tell you that you’re dead, lay down!”
Personally, if I have to inform someone that the time to end things is approaching, I try to do so gently. However, some people simply refuse to hear me, or just as bad, they will want to know when the next “one true love” is coming (as if instantly having another romance will somehow replace the current one!) When you leave a relationship, it is Nature’s way of giving your some time to heal and assess the situation. What is it that you are really seeking in your life? Give yourself healing time that is equal to at least half of the amount of time you put into the relationship. Be gentle with yourself. There is more room in a broken heart that has healed. Moving too quickly into another relationship will leave you unprepared for the life lessons you were meant to learn.
Relationships move in seasons: the young discovery and first excitements of Spring when you initially meet, the white hot passion of Summer when the love becomes physical, the cooling contentment of Autumn and the cold, frightening chill of Winter…and, if you have a relationship that has real roots, it will stand the Winter and bring you another Spring…every time! Anything else is an affair that will make for an interesting tale to be told or remembered before the evening’s fire. To make it into something it isn’t means that you are trying to force Karmic actions into place and that never works! Do not allow yourself to become cynical about love for it comes to us all…time and again…and in its own Time.
Share your soulmate stories with us!