Renegotiate and Live in Reality
It’s easy to be faithful in the first flush of romance, when love is blooming profusely and both of you are totally into each other. But what happens when real life sets in, and romance takes a back seat to dirty dishes, job stresses, and other realities of life? It isn’t unlikely that one partner or the other might seek excitement outside the relationship—but you can protect your marriage or partnership if you focus on reality.
Keep your eyes and ears open and your wits about you. I’m not saying spy on your partner, be aware of the temperature of your relationship. At the first sign of something amiss, sit down with your spouse or lover and determine what each of you needs in the present moment. It’s likely your needs have changed, and it’s healthy to renegotiate how you live or love together.
As you move away from the heat of new love, you have to settle in to a realistic way of coming together. Show interest in what your guy does at work. You don’t have to absorb every dry detail, but make time to enthuse about achievements and milestones. Help your woman meet challenges of organizing your lives. Women take that task on, but it isn’t fun to do it alone.
Don’t attempt to fix your partner. Fix yourself. Work at being a couple, and spend time every day doing simple things that make you special together. Slow way down and reach out to your lover. If you don’t have a strong base of friendship, you won’t have a healthy relationship.
Stay in the moment. Forget accusations and recriminations about past behaviors. Keep today interesting, warm, and secure. Act as if you’re perfectly content and you’ll find you are. When you disagree about something, handle it promptly and calmly. Never let resentment build.
Be faithful, loyal, and committed in your own mind and heart. If you play games or leave yourself open to opportunities to stray or play, your partner will feel the vibes. Revisit the reasons you fell in love and re-value the best things about your mate. You’ve spent time building this relationship, isn’t it worth putting effort into maintaining it?
Guard your own health and each other’s. Keep healthy and fit, sharing time for exercise and learning about good nutrition together. There’s not much need to stray when you both feel on top of your game.
When you practise keeping a strong focus on how good you are together, you’ll put up a firewall between yourselves and the fear of affairs spoiling your lives. Laugh together, play often, take a deep look at each other everyday and treasure what you see. Your partnership and romance will only get better when home is the sweetest, safest place.