Nerdy Turned Player: Smart Guys Still Cheat!

Oh yes! A rebuttal…  In a comment on our Do Smarter Men Cheat Less? post, one reader thinks that just because a guy is smart doesn’t mean he won’t act out of egotistical selfishness. Perhaps, being smart or “nerdy” might give the brainiacs even more of a reason to look for attention from female callers. Growing up unpopular in school, Mr. Smartypants might come to realize, “Hey! … this ain’t high school … where the ladies at?” Babsy seems to think so …

I dated a genius with a 190 IQ. Yes, you read that right. He liked to think that smarter men required more options… so to speak. He was pretty upfront about it. Sometimes dudes have a “nerd gone cool” vibe — they didn’t get to be players in high school because they were glued to chemistry books and their faces had more pock marks than a piece of pizza crust… so now they want to remake themselves as “hooers.” Studs, Hefner wannabees, whatever you call it…

So the tables have turned … well ladies, what do you think? And what about women? Do brains have anything to do with women cheating?

9 thoughts on “Nerdy Turned Player: Smart Guys Still Cheat!

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  3. Abigailx9570

    There are so many reasons people will say they cheated and then there are a lot and some that I have done therapy for will say I don’t know why I did it and that’s really the truth for them. Either way the karma of the whole thing comes back in the end. Just like if you cheat on a test and you got a passing score did you really learn anything and who really is cheated in the end? The cheater themselves.

    Many Blessings
    ~Abigail ~

  4. loki

    yeah, so, I love all of your attempts at sounding clever and deep on a subject that has been around since the oldest profession, so, for all you who think that intelligence has ANYTHING to do with cheating, wake up. It’s a lack of character. Nothing more. Nothing less. This isn’t rocket science, guys.

  5. Crown


    I believe that Maryanne is on to something regarding men and women being culpable in this. I once dated a girl studying satellite payload technology during her final year at M.I.T.

    I mean I don’t consider myself a dummy and I do love science, but Astronaut was never on my list of things to do in life.

    Eventually, said woman began dating one of her instructors. Perhaps I subliminally sabotaged the relationship for fear of my own intellectual deficiencies or maybe she grew weary of having to explain the minutia of her work to me during dinner conversations. Either way it ran its course however I have often wondered if level of learnedness had anything to do with the cheat scenario.


  6. maryannex9146Maryanne x9146


    Excellent article and excellent response from Miss Krystal. I agree-anyone can cheat.

    The reasons for cheating-male or female-smart, medium, not so smart undoubtedly are very individual, however, I do believe they include insecurity as well as over ego, fear of getting too close to their actual partner and therefore open to getting hurt so forcing that by cheating, as a result of feeling unfulfilled in their primary relationship but being unable or unwilling to put in the effort to effect change in their primary relationship, and a host of others. It has been my experience that some cheaters actually seem to cheat and “allow” themselves to be caught in order to get out of a relationship-a form of a passive/agressive move.

    I always wish there was a way to avoid any one of our clients or ourselves having to go through the pain of cheating or being cheated upon-it really is so painful.


    Extension 9146

  7. Meghan

    I think we should worry less about the intelligence of the cheaters and more about the intelligence of the people who tolerate the cheating…

  8. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500


    I agree with Miss Krystal…..

    IQ doesn’t matter …….but I will say I’ve seen men with high IQ’s cheat because they think they are smart enough to not get caught…..kind of like a game.
    Remember too, that a high percentage of Geeky-high-IQ types make good $$$$$ too. They know that even if a gal thinks they are nerdy looking….they can dangle the ” $$$$$ lure ” ,to buy her or impress her.

    Where as an average guy will cheat by relying on his looks, brawn,and sexuality.

    But anybody can cheat…not-so-smart or smart. They just have different reasons and employ different techniques.

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    But then on the flip side of the coin, one could argue….how smart is any cheater(?)….they usually get caught one way or another in the end.

  9. misskrystal

    Yes, of course, I have seen these types of men around. They dump wonderful women, because they think they can do better….”If I can get this, well, what else can I get.” And it is very sad. A lot of them try to come back, too. I know because I see it all of the time. I am sure there are many readers thinking the same thing right now as I write this.

    It takes all types to cheat. I am talking about ALL people, too. And yes, the nerdy girl of HS, later, gets a big makeover, and yes, can do the same thing! They have also dumped some wonderful men, thinking they, too, can do just “a little better.”

    It’s one thing if you are miserable, and working out a terrible relationship. But just to get Ego boosting is a very dangerous thing, especially, if you have a partner who is wonderful to you. However, let’s be real, if someone is your partner, and treating you like junk, of course, there are major challenges in order to be loyal-due to such. Common sense. I have only seen super spiritual people who dedicate themself to their faith, be able to still be loyal when a partner is caught being unfaithful. Of course there are some who don’t have to be into faith, that can do it, but not many, not at least in my experience. Most people, whether male or female, lose respect for their partner, when being lied to, betrayed, etc. This is how a lot of people end up being unfaithful-Some have to “Even the score”, only just to stay in the relationship or, they can’t. It is what it is…

    I have seen people be able to tolerate this and try to improve the situation by being spiritual, dedicating it to a higher purpose, God, and lifting it all to prayer and meditation. This seems to work the best, from what I have observed….Otherwise, look, let’s be real…If the relationship was pretty good, and something like this happens, there is a better chance to work it out, for the victim of betrayel. However, if it has not been a good relationship, with low levels of respect, and then you find out they had an affair, it’s usually the end.

    Anyone can cheat. Smart, plain, handsome, gorgeous and so on etc.
    Miss Krystal


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