How to End an Affair

How to End an Affair

End an Affair the Right Way

Are you having or have you ever had an affair? Wasn’t it so fun, exciting and sexy in the beginning? Do you know why you did it? There are so many reasons why people have affairs. Some people are bored in their relationships and are looking for a little extracurricular excitement. Others like the secretiveness of an affair—a relationship that no one else knows about. But there comes a time when all affairs must end. Do you know how to end an affair the right way?

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How to end an affair depends on how complicated the circumstances surrounding the affair are. It also depends on the circumstances of your affair. Besides a mutual attraction, what drew you to each other? What promises, if any, did you make to one another? What did you both expect to get out of the affair?

Having a Fling

If you both were just looking for a little fun, with no commitments, no strings attached, and no significant others at home, then it’s a lot easier to end this kind of affair. If you’ve communicated and understood each other’s intentions from the start, there’s a good chance parting ways will be amicable. However, if communication wasn’t something you focused on during the affair, one of you could end up feeling hurt and rejected. Tread lightly. Let the other person know that the sexual part of your relationship is coming to and end, if you want to remain friends. But if you no longer want any contact with this person, just make it clear that what you shared was fleeting.

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Experimenting With Polyamory

At some point in their lives, many people are comfortable having an open, sexual relationship. Perhaps you are exploring the polyamorous lifestyle, or you don’t feel like being in a monogamous relationship. Whatever the reason, there may come a time when you want to be monogamous or perhaps you want to be single for a while. When it’s time to end this kind of relationship, explain that you are in the process of discovering your sexuality, or that your tastes in and desires for companionship have changed. Express your appreciation to them for being a part of your sexual journey and helping you discover your sexuality.

Sleeping With a Coworker

First, let’s hope that your coworker is not a subordinate or you their’s. If you see them regularly, you need to be kind and compassionate. You need to discuss, like adults, how you’ll handle work interactions going forward. How will you handle projects and presentations? How will you handle conferences and business trips? If you’ve had an affair with your boss, or someone who reports to you, you want to do everything you can to settle things amicably. If you have to get human resources involved, both your jobs could be at stake.

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Cheating on a Partner 

If one or both of you are in a committed relationship, you have to know what kind of risk you’re taking. All relationships have their ups and downs and you or both of you have stepped outside your relationship to find comfort and more elsewhere. It comes down to this: Either you leave your partners and get together, or end the affair. If you’ve chosen to end the affair, you need to treat each other with dignity and respect. First, deal with your lover’s feelings, but at the same time, be clear that the affair is coming to an end. Don’t waver. No matter how they beg or plead, and no matter how great the sex is, if you’ve made the decision to end things, do it.

My Best Friend’s Partner

If you’ve ever lusted after a friend’s partner, you can see how these types of affairs take off. But, if you ultimately think your friendship is too valuable to ruin, you should end things with their partner. You also need to consider what could happen when the three of you share space again.

Honesty

After ending an affair, some people feel a strong need to be honest with their partners and tell them they’ve cheated. But before you confess, consider why you’re doing it. Are you doing it to unburden yourself, or are you doing it because you think your partner has the right to know and you would want to know if the situation were reversed? No matter you motivations, your partner is going to be very hurt. You’ve broken the trust in your relationship, and if your partner still wants to be with you after you’ve confessed your affair, it’s going to take a long time to get that trust back.

Is honestly always the best policy? Psychic Amelia ext. 9772 can tell you how they’ll react to your honesty. 

The Wrong Kind of Love 

Consider why you’ve had an affair in the first place, or why you prefer to have casual flings with people. Are you getting the love you really want? Do you think you don’t deserve a commitment? No matter the reason, when you’re ready to end an affair, do it with compassion, respect and kindness. And be practical about how your lives with intersect (if at all) going forward.

3 thoughts on “How to End an Affair

  1. Marc from the UK

    I do not entirely agree with Reiki Girl, sometimes you meet someone totally unexpected and it blows your mind, affairs are like all relationships they need work to keep them going, sometimes people come into your life to teach a lesson and learn one themselve’s. The people who are serial affair seekers are the ones who need to seek counselling.

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  2. Reikigirl

    Hi Pam ~ From what I’ve seen in all my years is that it’s possible it can last, but generally doesn’t. Usually those kinds of relationships are built on lust, and that usually has a short shelf life as well. If it’s called an “affair,” there’s usually something clandestine about it…meaning either partner has a significant other…and cheating in a relationship is rarely positive. Peace and Light.

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