Are You an Empath?

And If So, How Do You Stop it from Making You Insane?

If this title interested you, you are either a Deanna Troy fan or have empathic abilities. An empath feels the emotions of others as though they are her own. Let’s say you’re an empath and go to the mall. There’s a mother chiding her child for being fussy about not getting a toy. You feel frustrated, angry and devastated.

Why? What the heck is going on?

Well, the mother is frustrated because she can’t buy her child everything he wants, either because she doesn’t have the money or she is teaching him some sort of value of money. There’s anger between the two of them because they’re arguing. Devastation comes from the child who can’t get the one thing, that oh-so-important thing, he must have. Multiply this by the several dozens of people you pass by in the mall and you just might go mad. Or shut down completely.

Why do you feel all this? Because you’re an empath! Everybody has empathy, but some people feel it so strongly, they can’t keep their own feelings separate from other people’s emotions.

Empaths who are so sensitive that a trip to the mall makes them feel exhausted and want to crawl into bed every time they come home haven’t learned what they are, how to guard themselves, or how to do the neatest thing they can do. An empath cannot only absorb emotions, but project them. Most people don’t know that about empaths, and Deanna Troy never did it per se, but her eyes sure did.

An aside to all you non-Star Trek fans. Deanna Troy is from a race of people on Star Trek who is an empath. She aides the crew by reading the feelings of alien races they encounter.

Back to projecting emotions. I feel this is the best way to both guard and enjoy your ability. If you’re so suffocated you can’t project anything, which I’ll get to, then guard first. There’s an old way. Make an imaginary, porous bubble around yourself. You tell the bubble what you allow in and keep out. You have to practice this. If you’re strong in empathy, you’re probably quite imaginative. You can make your bubble look, feel, smell, or even taste like anything that works for you. Try it all the time when you’re feeling the emotions of others.

How do you tell your own emotions from others? Well, that’s another blog post. But let’s get to projection, probably your best tool in your toolbox and your greatest strength as an empath.

I’ll go back to the mall example. The mom is fussing. The child is crying. You have your bubble up. It’s purple, feels like Christmas lights look, and smells like Jasmine. You’re filtering in the information like you’re reading a book, but your body, mind and heart are all feeling it.

Here’s where the projection comes in. You think of who you most relate to – the mother or the child. I’m betting it’s the kid. You think of a time when you were a little one, then what made you happy at that time. Then you do your darndest to make eye-contact with the kid. Push the feeling you get from your memory out to him when you look at each other. If you’re an empath and strong with it, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about by “pushing.” There’s a joy in your heart when you do it, a connection feeling that overwhelms you, and you can almost read each others’ minds.

Don’t forget Mom, though. Even if you don’t completely relate to her, try to push a little relaxation her way, too. Eye-contact, a smile as though to say, “Oh, children, what can you do?” might make her feel not so lost and alone in the motherly world. She’ll feel better.

The best part about projection is, as an empath, you get to enjoy the emotions you project to others back to you. Happy feelings all around.

A caution about projection I must add, though. It could exhaust you if you aren’t in a good place with accepting your empathy. And that, too, is for another blog post. When you project, make sure your bubble or however you keep from being overwhelmed is in place. An empath’s strongest ability is her imagination. Use it, and use it often. It will only get stronger and better.

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7 thoughts on “Are You an Empath?

  1. Opal Bowling

    Please keep me on your list. I truly enjoyed reading your blog and I most definitely can relate to your example with the mother and child. Whenever I am anywhere that I hear a child cry, my heart hurts. I get so upset that I want to go and take the child in my arms to comfort it. If I see a parent jerking a child around and speak harshly I get so angry I can make myself sick. Many times I’ve had to leave a store or mall to keep from doing something I know I’ll regret. My husband has even made me move away to get out of earshot so I can calm down.

    Thank you for your article. I look forward to more.

  2. Ophelia, EXT 5078

    Hi Melanie,

    All I can say is never give up on yourself, and nobody else will, either. Dry spells happen to everyone. Examine your past loves. Were they very important? Did something come from them which makes you less likely to feel comfortable around a potential partner?

  3. Ophelia, EXT 5078

    Thanks for your encouragement. Leslie Anne, it can drive ya bonkers! Build walls, learn how to project…and eventually you’ll be the one people come to with their problems (they are and always have eh?) but now you can practice at pushing out your happy to them and sense the change of their mood without sucking in all their pains. Takes time and work, but I know you can do it.

  4. Leslie Ann

    I am empathic/intuitive and I can definately relate to this article (I kinda sided with the mom though-even though I felt both of their sides/pain). At times, it can be exhausting because I do get “wrapped up” in other people’s stuff/emotions very easily but I am learning to separate by saying “it’s their stuff, not mine.” This is a great article and I look forward to reading more articles from you Ophelia:)

  5. Melanie

    Hello, I am 34 year old women who has had lots of trouble with men and even tried dating sites. DO you see love in my future because it has been about 8 years since my last relationship. Please help me with answers.


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