Get Good With the Folks
So, you’ve landed the guy, and you’re crazy about him, but his parents have yet to accept you into the friendly family fold. Here are a few tips on how to convert that chilly reception to something warm and welcoming.
Dressing the part can go a long way towards gaining his parents’ respect. Whatever activity you have planned together, dress accordingly. Just as clothes that are too tight or too low cut can seem “trampy,” overdressing or dressing too conservatively can seem uppity or overly conservative.
Graciousness is a quality that everyone can appreciate and admire in others. Whether you’re thanking them for hosting a dinner, or sharing an evening out, showing appreciation and gratitude displays a thoughtfulness and good breeding that will be hard to resist.
Do your homework regarding his parents. Ask your beau as many questions as necessary until you feel like you have a handle on his parent’s lives, work, and interests. Everyone likes to talk about themselves, and if you are aware of and show respect for what’s going on in his family, they are bound to be touched by how much you care.
Use that new knowledge to stimulate conversation. Not only can you talk about their interests, but sharing yours with them invites them to build a closer group connection to you. Through animated discussion, you can get to know and understand one another on a deeper level.
While the jury may still be out on you, it’s a given that they love their son, and naturally want what’s best for him. Making his parents aware of your positive impact on his life- through your love, support, and inspiration, is a sure-fire method for melting even the frostiest disposition.
So perhaps you haven’t put your best foot forward with his parents to date. Different personalities and different lifestyles can make for challenging personal connections. If you just can’t seem to connect with his parents, try switching tactics – such as bringing up other topics of discussion, and allowing them to guide the conversation. Using your intuition, consider carefully what may be alienating them from you. For example, if they aren’t as comfortable with PDA, don’t invade their personal space or hang all over their son during your time together.
Winning over his parents’ hearts can be a huge challenge, and you simply do not know where they’re coming from unless you do the detective work. Whether it’s a past favored girlfriend on their minds, a miscommunication, or a test they insist on putting you through, keep in mind these guidelines, and follow your heart – it led you to him, and eventually his family will come around.