When Looking for Love Has Gotten You Nowhere
The dating game is not for the faint of heart, with so many minefields and pitfalls to watch out for. But what happens when a few years down the road you realize that not only are you still single, but that you’ve lost some good partners for one reason or another. Maybe it’s fate that you haven’t found “the one” yet, or perhaps, you’re driving potential mates away with one or two negative qualities which render you un-dateable. Here are some of the more common ways that you may be hitting that destruct button in your relationships.
Are you sabotaging budding relationships before they really take hold in an effort to protect yourself? Is your fear of commitment keeping you so closed off with your partner that he or she is left with no choice but to move on? If you are not able to give 100% to the relationship, it’s a waste of time for both of you, and they will eventually choose to move on to greener pastures.
2. High Maintenance
Do you need constant attention and validation from your significant other? Are your needs so great that your partner must always compromise their comfort to appease you? If you can’t learn to compromise and to put them first as well, they’ll eventually look elsewhere for a more equal partnership.
3. Control Freak
Must you have the final say about every little aspect of your relationship? Do you railroad your beau with your own opinions and interests? If it’s strictly your way or the highway, be prepared to be left in the dust.
4. Not Over Your Ex
It’s a sad fact that sometimes people carry the baggage of their ex for years, and through many relationships. If you haven’t put him to rest, your heart will never be open enough for the next guy, and it’s only a matter of time before your partner realizes that and moves on.
There’s no room for selfishness in love, and if you can’t see past your own needs to be there for your partner, you will eventually lose him. In a relationship, each person must offer support and emotional nourishment for the other: if it’s all about you, the love has no chance to grow.
There is no meaningful relationship without trust, and if you can’t find it within yourself to be open and honest with your partner, you shouldn’t be in a relationship with them. If you’re lying to them, even about the little things, it means you don’t trust that he or the relationship can handle the truth. When you’re caught in the lie, and it’s only a matter of time, don’t be surprised when he moves on to someone to whom he can safely entrust his heart.