Have You Fallen for These Relationship Myths?
Relationship myths are a dime a dozen and the fact is, we all fall for them. One person’s warm and fuzzy myths—sharing forks, waking up next to the same person for the rest of their life, finishing each other’s sentences, etc.—is another person’s nightmares. They’d rather have the whole bed to themselves. They’d rather not share their food. They’d rather complete their own sentences… But the truth is, relationships are not black and white. They’re actually as unique as the people in them. Here are five common relationship myths that you’ve most likely believed and why you should stop believing them starting now.
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The Guy Pays for Everything
Many women expect the men they’re dating to pay for everything when they go out. Is he your partner or is he your sugar daddy? Sure, there are guys who insist on paying for everything because they consider it an act of chivalry, but it’s wrong for a woman to expect (or demand) them to. If you’ve got a job and can afford to go out, at least reach for the bill when it comes. Pay half, and even treat your guy to a meal more than once in a great while. It’s a thoughtful gesture, but more importantly, it shows that you’re an equal partner in your relationship.
The Sex Gets Boring
A lot of people don’t want a long-term relationship because they think the sex gets boring. Well if you do it the same way every time, it’ll get boring no matter whom you’re with. But you don’t have to do it the same way every time. You can try new locations, new positions and new toys. And if you’re in an open relationship, you can always mix it up with new partners. If your sex life is boring, it’s because you let it get that way.
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You Can Let Yourself Go
In the early stages of a relationship, everyone puts a lot of effort into looking their best. They may go to the gym often, keep up with their personal grooming or watch what they eat. But as the months and years go by, there is a tendency to get lazy. Maybe you’ve stopped going to the gym. Maybe he lets his toenails grow out and they’re cutting your legs in bed. Think about it: Would you have given him a second look if you knew he peed with the door open or walked around in the same underwear for days? And would you have let him see you pluck chin hairs in front of the television all those months or years ago? I’m guessing not. So let’s keep a little mystery in your relationship and make an effort to maintain your appearance.
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You Can’t Have Guy Friends
You should never have to choose between your friends and your mate—even if you’re friends with men. Women and men can be friends and as long as your guy friends aren’t trying to undermine your romantic relationship, everything should be fine. If your partner is feeling insecure, don’t dismiss his feelings. Instead, talk about why he feels the way he does. And make sure he meets your guy friends. Whatever fears are rolling around is his mind about your guy friends can be soothed by actually meeting them. I’m sure they’re not as handsome, as successful and as funny as your guy imagines them to be.
You Eventually Have to Get Married
I’ve actually heard men say that they proposed to their girlfriends because they felt like they had to get married in order to continue to be with them after dating a few years. They didn’t take the time to consider if these women would make good wives, partners or mothers. Marriage just seemed like the next “logical” step. There truth is there is no statute of limitations on dating. You can date a person for years—even decades—and not be obligated to marry them. If you don’t want to get married, don’t, but make sure your partner doesn’t want to get married either. But if you do want to get married, make sure your partner wants the same thing and then you both can agree on when to get engaged.
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It’s All Up to You
When it comes to relationships, you write the rules. I don’t care what your parents or your friends say—it’s your life to live and no one else’s. Don’t avoid companionship and intimacy because you think you have to do it a certain way in order for it to be “right.” Love is as much about feeling as it is about action. If the way you structure a romantic relationship feels right to you, you’re doing it right!