Sex Q&A: Cursed in Love

Tara Wrote:

Hello Liam, I had a life changing event happen to me. I reconstructed my life and started dating once again, every man I have met seems to enjoy my company to a escalating point and then they just don’t want to commit. This has happened so many times that I’m beginning to think I’m cursed. What is it that’s blocking me from having a real relationship with someone? Please help me understand.


I thank you for this interesting question. As life moves along a very cyclical path, there are often times when one goes through periods where certain themes become repetitive, even to the point of near insanity for those who experience them. I feel that this event you speak of really brought you beyond your comfort zone, forced you to reexamine yourself in many ways, perhaps to even question your own mortality and purpose as a human being.

This is also where true character takes root and enables you to grow as a human being. In looking at your situation, you are clearly developing into a loving and successful woman. You have much to give. I can see why many men seek your company. They come, they indulge you emotionally and sexually, and then move on to the next lady. This is a characteristic of male biology in part. To overcome this, men must be truly seduced and enchanted in order for this behavior to change. You have the tools to do this, but I sense there are some shortcomings in a few minor areas that can be mended easily.

First, I advise you to swear off dating for a spell. You have become obsessed with the issue of commitment to the point you are no longer able to enjoy the person you’re with. You aren’t really feeling passion with these men. What you are passionate about is wanting a boyfriend; and though there are men out there capable of giving you this, you are exuding the vibration of a woman more interested in a relationship than the man. Men who sense a woman is too eager for commitment often run right into the arms of the next woman to come along. What I want you to do is concentrate on art. Yes, art. Not men, not romance. Art. You need to reconnect with being in and enjoying the moment. I sense you are a creative sort, so find your vibe and flow with it. Learn to be passionate about now, not tomorrow. Stay away from dating sites and tell your friends no thanks on the next blind date.

Flow from the heart and stop trying. You attract most what you are not seeking. Suddenly you will find yourself meeting men in odd ways. They will approach you. When you feel like going back to dating, start slowly, concentrate on just enjoying that person for whatever time you spend together. Enjoy sharing time with someone for real, and they’ll want to spend more of their time with you. Commitment is a by-product of passion and romance, not the goal or end result. It is icing on the cake. In your case, release your stress and move with harmony. In very little time, I feel you’ll be quite pleased.

Be well.


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