The Importance of Empowerment

Today’s world can be overwhelming. Between balancing our budgets, keeping up with today’s highly competitive work environment, and engaging in all sorts of relationships ranging from intimate to casual, we can be tempted to believe everything happens to us – but that’s taking a back seat to our own destiny. The truth remains that people are active beings. We happen to the world. As much as we like to think that our partners, our friends, and our pets make us happy (or miserable), it’s not true: we make ourselves happy, and it all starts with empowerment.

Empowerment is more than some sentimental words posted visibly near your desk or on your bathroom mirror. It’s a mantra, something you say so many times that you feel it down to your core. You don’t just believe you are a beautiful divine being, you know it. Empowerment is being able to take responsibility for your own choices, actions and happiness. Other peoples’ actions may affect your life, but your reaction will always belong to you. Some callers ask me, “Is my luck going to change?”; “Will my soul mate ever find me?”; or, “Am I destined for failure?” I want to save you some time by answering these questions here and now: Your luck is already changing. You will find your true love when you make room in your life for that love. No one is destined for failure. Now you can rephrase those questions with an empowered attitude: “What can I do to make my own luck?” “How do I find true love?” and “How do I create happiness?” If you see the difference in that second set of questions, you are already making progress toward co-creating your future with the Universe.

Our choices affect other people in a continuous ripple on the giant web of existence. When your circumstances go awry because of your own or someone else’s misjudgment, or catastrophe strikes, you can either take the back seat and feel sorry for yourself, or you can take a firm hold on the steering wheel of your life to take action, create change, to heal, to mend, and begin again. The process can be as subtle as the cracking of an egg, or as magnificent as a phoenix rising from its own ashes. Each decision is a chance at rebirth.

I have a friend who once saw herself as a victim of her circumstances. Her parents divorced before she could walk, and she moved around a lot as a child. She endured a long and painful custody battle. As she grew up, her mother remained very protective and discouraged her from learning essential skills like balancing her own budget, managing her schedule, even cooking anything more complicated than macaroni and cheese. Once she moved out, she asserted her newfound independence by making compulsive decisions about everything. A string of casual lovers and false friends later, after her money had run out, she spent time being angry at her parents, her lovers, and her friends. Then she realized that she needed to take care of herself because no one else was capable of taking care of her all the time.

From that moment on, she began to teach herself how to survive in the world on her own. She took courses on positive goal setting and achieving. She worked her way through college and gradually earned true independence. She still works to let go of her resentment toward people who let her down, and to be grateful for the lessons life teaches her. Today she is happy and successful with her career and marriage, and always looks for ways to improve herself and her life. If you ask her she’ll tell you, “It all started when I realized that I create my own reality.”

How do you create your own reality – and can we learn to do it with greater skill?

8 thoughts on “The Importance of Empowerment

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  5. ivyx5198

    Than you so much for this article. I know this wil lbless everyone who reads it. This reminds of the Mary Tyler Moore show. You know, in the begining when she throws her hat in the air all smiles? That is another good Mantra, “We’re gonna make it after all!” Yeah us!
    Ivy oxox

  6. velvetoversteel

    Great article, Estel! Empowering myself what exactly what I needed to do to be truely happy! I too was very resentful for my childhood, parents problems, ex-husband, all the way to the poor teachers my special needs son had when he was younger. It wasn’t until I stopped blaming & complaining about all the people who did do a better job, at whatever, that I took full charge & responsibility for my own life, my son’s and our futures.

    I always thought of myself as independant, because I could take care of myself and my children. But I wasn’t until I stopped expecting other people to do whatever it was that I felt they should or could. From teachers not believing in my son, to his dad not spending time with him.

    So we moved to another state and school, where the teachers did believe in him. Then since my older sons where away at college, I found a male mentor for my youngest son. No family members would teach my son to drive (he didn’t want me too!), so I signed him up for a driver’s ed class. The list goes on and on! The last 5 years of my life have been very, very empowering for me! I love the person I have become. Now I am independant and so is my son, who has learned to ask for help and appreciate education and the people who believe in him.

    I blamed and complained about how the men in my life have treated me. Until I realiztook responsibility for my own choices, actions and happiness. (such a good point you made!)

    There was a time I ignored the ‘red flags’ and even tried to save one or two. Silly me….. I don’t do either anymore! So guess what? The ‘red flag’ type of men, don’t ask me out anymore. I must not be attracting that not so great type ever since empowered myself with self-worth, self-confidence and self-love!

    Thank you for a ‘must read’ post for everyone!



  7. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Estel just wrote a very powerful and important article. I applaud this article and give it a standing ovation.

    We are all down here, on the Earthly plane, to walk our own individual Karmic path.

    ******Many either forget or simply just don’t know that : We were all given the inner tools, and gifts, we need to succeed in this incarnation from the moment of our birth*****!!!!!!!!!!!

    And,I can tell you, as somebody who has crossed over twice, that we come into this world alone and we are going out the same way.

    You have the power to mold and shape your destiny or Karmic path by the choices that you make, and by your own actions and decisions.

    Are you going to choose to be a victim alongside the highway of Life, or are you going to blaze your own trail and” roll with the punches ” along the way ?????
    THAT is the real question.

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

  8. misskrystal

    Hi Estel,
    I really enjoyed your post. Thank you.
    Everything you wrote is so true. I hope everyone finds the time to read this and thoroughly absorb all of the pertinent details. In my own experience, it is so important to accept conditions as they are. Even though the chance for change is always possible, accepting conditions as they are, in the present, appears to be one of the best places to begin a “New winning attitude.”

    Another thing, avoid negative thoughts to come into your life. Block them. So many people discourage themselves with negative thought patterns, and this keeps many people in a place of feeling depressed and stuck.

    Once we get on a roll, and avoid negativity, empowering thoughts are much more easier to grasp, and we can really start to enjoy the beauty of life. Spiritually speaking, if you believe in God and universe, and have the faith, there is not any reason to keep your enemies near. Also, spiritual people who enjoy full lives, tend to steer clear of others who have caused prior trouble or disturbances. Additionally, if a pal has let you go, and you really did not understand why that happened, just make peace with it, wish them well in spirit, and let it be. By doing this, the universe will literally reward you and, you will find, eventually, the universe will bring you a better buddy! Please never forget, the people who want happy lives, don’t go around trying to force relationships, they merely keep an open mind until a nice situation presents itself.

    Miss Krystal


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