It’s late in the evening, you and your partner have been spending time together with stimulating conversation, playing psychological footsie, and you’re both revved to get it on. You barely make it to the bed,your body shakes with anticipation!
And then it screeches to a halt.
Sexual turnoffs are taboo. YOUR bedroom antics are limiting your sex life. We’ve all dished on what horrifying things our partners have desired, but have we looked at ourselves?
Here are 5 cringe-worthy acts which make most people hit the brakes:
1. Baby Talk: Goo-goo Ga-WHAT? Unless your actual kink is to dress up in a diaper and cry, this is one of the biggest blunders. Two consenting adults shouldn’t have to deal with, “I wuv making wuv to you my schmookie pookie.”
2. Talking Dirty (Badly!): There is almost nothing sexier than a man or woman who can tease the corners of your mind while pleasing the contours of your body. Confidence is key. But if you’re going to call the sociological focus of his manhood a “Johnson,” or call her breasts, “boobies,” it’s better to keep it to simple. Just use body language as encouragement!
3. Leather and Whips and Chains, oh my! What can be said about someone who suddenly drops their sexual kink on their unsuspecting victim…I mean partner. There’s nothing wrong with having these preferences, but to suddenly demand reciprocal behavior from an assumingly sober playmate is terrifying.
4. Watching Television: There’s nothing wrong with a little background noise, especially if you’re not into hearing the sloppy wet noises of actually having sex. But it’s a pretty safe assumption that your partner is engaging with you because they actually like you, regardless if they love you. So it would make sense that they’d be turned off to the fact that you are acting as little more than a living sex-doll.
5. Zzzzzzzz: For some of us, the day is long and exhausting, and all we need is a little rest. But if you’re going to engage in sex play, it’s highly recommended that you NOT fall asleep. It doesn’t matter if you’re married, a hook up, or dating – the one thing passing out during sex is going to guarantee you is NOT sleeping. Instead, you will be dealing with the drama you have unleashed because now your partner thinks that there is something wrong with them or that the sex is boring. Better put on a pot of coffee, yikes!
There are, obviously, other sexual turn-offs (i.e. someone who has never heard of “keeping it groomed”). However, these five cater to all creeds, breeds, and ages, and more specific turn offs are highly subjective! One person’s taboo is another person’s fantasy. Just try not to snuff out the moment by dumping one of these on your victim, I mean partner!
What turns you off? Tell us more.