Putting an Expiration Date on Love

Using Ultimatums in Love

When you think about your current relationship, are you wondering if it’s time to call it quits? Do you love your partner, but feel like your relationship isn’t going anywhere? When it comes to love, sometimes we have to limit how much we give our partner so we can protect ourselves from heartbreak. We have to put an expiration date on love.

There are ultimatums that ask our partners to make a choice: “Marry me or we’re breaking up.” “Get a better job or we’re breaking up.” “Move in with me or we’re breaking up.” While an ultimatum may jump-start a relationship and get it moving forward again, they often don’t work as expected. Sometimes the even backfire. And some people are afraid to put their relationship on the line and challenge their partner. They fear they’ll end up alone and full of regret.

If you’re relationship is feeling stagnant, it may be time to take action. It’s important to remember that giving your partner an ultimatum may not get you the results you want. You need to prepare yourself for all potential outcomes.

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The first thing you need to do is make sure that your relationship is going nowhere. Here are some signs to consider:

No Signs of a Future Together

If you have a vision for what your future should look like—marriage, house and kids—your partner should have the same vision too. And more importantly, they have to want all those things with you. If you’ve been together for a long time and the future never comes up, chances are they don’t see you together down the road.

So how can be sure? Confront your partner and ask them what they want out of your relationship and if they see a future with you. Don’t settle for comments like” “We’re taking it day by day” or “I don’t like to think too far ahead.” If you want a future with them, ask for it. Just be prepared to hear something you may not like.

Do you have a future with your partner? Psychic Reed ext. 5105 can tell you!

Your Communication Has Taken a Dive

Communication is extremely important when it comes to a successful relationship. If you feel like you and your partner aren’t communicating as well as you used to, bring it up to them. If you feel like you are doing all the communicating and talking to your partner is like talking to a wall, it might be time to put an expiration date on your relationship.

5 Years from Now

Can you see yourself with them five years from now? If communication doesn’t improve and they won’t make a commitment to you, do you even want to be with them five years down the road? If you see them not changing, maybe it’s time to move on. If you don’t, you might end up feeling very alone in a relationship.

You Blame Each Other and Fight Often

If you communicate by fighting, you know that’s a problem. If you are always blaming each other for everything that goes wrong in your relationship, you know there is a problem. If you constantly hurt each other with your words and actions, you might not be destined to be together in the long-term.

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Healthy relationships are based on respect, understanding, communication and care. If you current relationship doesn’t have any of these qualities, chances are your won’t be together much longer. That’s why it’s important to put an expiration date on love. Give your partner time to change, but don’t give them an unlimited amount of time. Know when you’re going to move on alone. It won’t be easy at first, but time will pass and you’ll know you’ve done the right thing. Life is too short to put up with a partner who doesn’t love and respect you in the way you want them to. You can find the mature relationship you desire, as long as you don’t let anything hold you back.

9 thoughts on “Putting an Expiration Date on Love

  1. Angel

    Ladies, there is no excuse for ‘sharing’ a man with another woman. Go find your own man!
    And Julia, much love, honey, but your ‘man’ (if he even really *deserves* to be called that) is a classic case of a narcissist. Men (and women) who are narcissists (or other sociopathic/psychopathic personality disorders) are not able to love.
    Ladies, if your man can’t seem to *make up his mind*, then make up yours. Date other men (I don’t mean sex other men). Meet for coffee, chat up men in line at the grocery store, etc (You don’t have to necessarily *date* other men either…just use each and every interaction with a man as *practice* for being your charming feminine self. 🙂 ) Take up a hobby. Focus on YOURSELF. No, that’s not being selfish. It’s called being healthy and balanced. As women, focusing on ourselves has come to mean the equivalent of a four-letter-word in our society, because we are expected to be the care-givers and nurtures. Well, how can you be that when you don’t attend to your needs first? And…do some serious soul-searching/therapy as to why you keep allowing yourself to put up with these men’s behaviour (And guys, this goes for you too, staying with toxic women). Much Love, All.

  2. reika

    i’ve been in relationship like that but am too afraid to be alone if i should leave him, cos it’s not easy for me to find someone new. but thanks for this great article, maybe i have to learn to be mature..

  3. Psychic Giovanna

    Excellent article! Settling in a relationship that is missing fundamental components is simply enabling the stagnation and unfulfilled aspects to continue. Not taking responsibility for one person’s part of the relationship always results in problems. If one wants a different result, different action and decision making is 100% necessary. We can not leave our happiness at the feet of another, and instead need to decide and act on what equates in our highest well being – independently of the other person. Co-dependency and other issues surface here when we do not. We also can’t wait around for the other person to change. In these cases, it is US we need to be working on.

  4. Toni

    Constance, You’re attracting men that is already in a relationship because their isn’t many single heterosexual men anymore. Get use to it. We have to share men now and they now it. I feel sorry for us but it’s true, and people hate hearing the truth.

  5. jula

    I’ve been in a ‘relationship’ with a liar for over 30 years. Always putting himself first and focused on fulfilling his dreams, but doesn’t give a damn about my feelings and the effect
    that his ‘brainwashing’ and attitude has had on others. Comes and goes as he pleases and
    expects me to be there ‘waiting’ for him while he lives in his head and not the real world.
    After a while, you start to hate yourself and lose your confidence. These men are just about
    themselves and their Ego’s, are not capable of real love and deserve to be ‘thrown out’ just
    like expired garbage. Most of these guys just string you along with broken promises and they
    just end up throwing you away anyways in the end. Waste of time and space in my view.
    I hope my sister gets rid of her ’emotional parasite’ which has robbed her of many years of
    her youth as well. Better off to be alone for awhile and find someone who treats you better
    and values and is capable of true love. Get rid of the old baggage and in the market for
    someone new. Both men and women are victims of these ’emotional’ abusers. Get free!!!

  6. sunshine

    this is all good, but married 24 years and misserable, to old to leave, just sad and broken, there is nothing to be said that can fit it.crying talking praying, I am cancer he is the fish. not the normal fish. he is happy.

  7. Cardellia Phillips

    I been in a relationship over 20 yesrs …I let it go had a reason…. so now it will be almost 3yrs we broken up …. so now I am single.. but have male friends. . Its seem like I am attraction to men’s who they r slready in a relationship. .. why why is that????


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