Are They a Past Life Connection or Your Soul Mate?

Are They a Past Life Connection or Your Soul Mate?

Have You Met Your Soul Mate Before?

Each person we meet along our path is an opportunity for our soul’s evolution. They show up with a message from our higher self or a lesson necessary for our development, either from a past life or to be dealt with in this lifetime. Each of these people is a soul mate, however, they have very different purposes.

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It’s confusing and frustrating to have undeniable chemistry with someone, even feeling they are “the one,” yet it isn’t working out. A magnetic force/connection seems to exist between the two of you. You could even find yourself ignoring your intuition and ethical code with this intoxicating, all-consuming, and addicting pull.

Your Heart Aches

It was either a perfect romance that ended (and all communication stopped), a romance that can’t seem to begin, or it’s an up/down, back-and-forth, off/on again experience. There were commitment issues, even cheating, and/or it seems impossible to leave this disrupting and unhealthy relationship. You can’t seem to get them off your mind and even more distressing, no matter what happened, your heart aches for this person. You cannot seem to move on and there’s a deep need to resolve things or at least have closure.

Karmic Connections 

These are examples of a past life or karmic connection, and you are not meant to be together in this lifetime. This person may actually have represented unfinished business needed to complete lessons for your soul’s growth and to help you bring in your soul mate. Understanding the differences between a past life connection and a soul mate allows us to release these connections and move on. You don’t have to stop loving this person or forget about them. Just for now, put them in a special place in your heart, appreciate what they brought into your life, and place them on a shelf. As you open up to connecting with your soul mate, the intensity from a karmic or past life connection fades.

This happened for me. I continued having intense past life karmic connections, until I finally changed my definition of what love is. When I first met my husband, I thought, “He’s cute, but he’s not my type.” Later, when we were engaged, I thought about how my so called “type” had not worked out so well. I realized my husband was my upgraded type and the perfect soul mate for me. Our type is often repeated karmic/past life attractions we’ve been stuck in. Seeing these patterns, and wanting to change your definition of what love is, you’ll discover you can create a new, improved type, exactly right for you.

Defining Love 

Our childhood environment, influences and role models,determine our definition of love. This definition continues to bring us what is familiar. As we learn lessons and grow, our very vibration raises our ability to attract people to our higher frequency. Our life partner can then come in, as we have done our work to receive them.

Something Needs Healing 

A past life connection or karmic relationship often triggers something needing healing, forgiveness and growth. These relationships often stir up heavy emotions, presenting the opportunities to progress and to step into a life expansion and soul advancement.

We’ve all experienced hardships, traumas, forms of abuse and adverse circumstances. Life can seem very unfair until we allow and receive the gifts of healing, growth, wisdom and the ability to help others.

Uncharted Waters 

A soul mate is a well-matched person who walks with you as a friend or in a love relationship. A soul mate has a subtle, comfortable, stable-feeling energetic connection. It feels as though you are home and, it can take some getting used to. It did for me. It’s very different from an intense, drama-stimulated chemistry connection that can throw you off balance. I dealt with a lot of anxiety as I dated my husband. My normal patterns and definitions of love were changing. I was in uncharted waters.

With a soul mate, there’s a deep connection with a sense of peace and trust in one another. You feel heard, understood and supported. You share similar desires and interests, and have a solid friendship. You feel encouraged and uplifted. You are each other’s priority while still attending to your own personal, spiritual and physical needs.

You will still have lessons to learn together, adjustments to make as you come together as a couple, and continued soul growth and then shedding old patterns, etc. The difference is you work through things, it’s a healthy relationship and you grow together.

Psychic Sterling ext. 6326

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40 thoughts on “Are They a Past Life Connection or Your Soul Mate?

  1. GEMINI6

    Hello! Sterling. Thank you so much for your advise, I really appreciate it. I will follow your
    suggestion and look for the book u suggested “Calling In The One.” Lets see what happens.

    Thank u again

  2. Sterling 6326

    DN April 23, 2015 at 9:11 am
    Thank you very much for your heartfelt response.
    I am guided to suggest to you to buy a copy of “Calling in the One” for yourself and one for your girlfriend. You will also find a wealth of information in “The Five Love Languages,” By Gary Chapman.
    Let me know if I can help you further.

  3. DN

    Just read through all three of your blog entries and enjoyed each one. I particularly liked the last section of this one where you spoke of dealing with a lot of anxiety while dating your husband as your normal definitions and patterns of love were changing.

    My long-distance girlfriend of a year has broken it off with me, and yet I sense that it’s not truly over yet but instead she needs space and time as she navigates her own uncharted waters. Reasons were given via email for the breakup, but they are all things that can be sorted through logistically…but we’re not in that space yet.

    Instead, I think she is in the midst of releasing a lot of anxieties and fears from her past as she makes her way through therapy. I sense the breakup move was more based on her anxiety than anything else. It has nothing to do with our connection. She still loves me, absolutely…which makes this even harder…….

    We’ve both told each other that being together just feels like home. It’s a connection that just doesn’t come along that often in a lifetime. As you said, there is a sense of peace and trust in one another. You do feel heard, understood and supported. You share similar desires and interests. You feel encouraged and uplifted. You are each other’s priority while still attending to your own personal, spiritual and physical needs. Our friendship seemed very solid….until she would get triggered and cut me off, or freak out and flip channels as one psychic on this site described it.

    I’ve had to let her go, but I’ve not given up. I realize she may never come back around again, but it seems too soon to move on. So I wait patiently while holding her in light and love, and I will do this until I have that intuitive sense that it is time to move on.

    Limbo can be challenging, but just wanted to say your blog entries gave me hope. Thank you!

  4. Sterling 6326

    Chrissi April 2, 2015 at 2:47 am

    Hi again,
    I also feel he is very much with you, loving and guiding you. There is so much more to life than what we realize on this earth plane, in our current physical experience.
    I also believe there is no real end, as our spirits and experiences continue on. Therefore we meet again those we are connected with, in our soul group/family. I feel the beautiful connection you have with one another which is unchanged by you still being in physical form and he in spirit form.

  5. Sterling 6326

    GEMINI6 March 21, 2015 at 2:02 pm

    Hi again,
    I suggest reading the book “Calling in the One.” It can help you change the definition of what love if for you. We form this definition early on from our parents/caregivers and their relationship, along with our experiences. We attract people in from this unconscious “familiarity.” I met my husband when in a book study for this class and know three others who met their significant other/life partners after reading this book and following through with the exercises given at the end of each chapter.

  6. Chrissi

    Sterling 2/24 5.13
    I suppose that was why although we were separated I always felt we might get together again and why when he died I felt so much as if a light had gone from my world even though we’d not seen each other for over 20 years – obviously there is still work here for me to do with the man I am married to and maybe myself or we’d have been together again somehow and maybe he would not have passed on so young- he was only 54. I do feel as if he is around me sometimes when I am low -and sometimes when I am making decisions which has always been hard for me as I tended to go along with whatever was going on if it was something I liked and not think of the consequences- which was the reason in this life we had had some problems in our relationship which only with age I even saw as problems

  7. GEMINI6

    Thank you Sterling for answering my e-mail. Right now I am sure to keep call my Leo friend
    anymore, which is the second gentleman I told u about. He is always busy and I feel he
    does not care enough. I feel I am wasting my time, at this time I am just to disappointed
    in dating anymore. We will remain friends and company, but will not have hopes for a
    future it looks like. I hate it because ones hopes get high and then to fall again, I am
    looking for a life partner (no marriage) but, it is so disappointing.

  8. Sterling x6326

    irene February 21, 2015 at 4:28 pm

    Yes, the tricky part sometimes can be recognizing your soul mate when they come in. It is a feeling of being home connection, comfortable, subtle and reassuring. It can feel exciting and wonderful however, not a drama/magnetic crazy feeling connection as in a past life/ karmic connection.

  9. Sterling x6326

    Monique (February 21, 2015 at 4:02 pm)

    I am glad to know you have done such great soul work. It is painful and challenging to say the least. You have really broken through some major stuff in this lifetime!! Bravo!!

  10. Sterling x6326

    aparna (February 21, 2015 at 8:19 pm)

    I appreciate you very much. I am honored to have a message for you from the divine.

  11. Sterling x6326

    Marc from the UK (February 23, 2015 at 1:01 pm)

    Yes, forgiveness…the way to healing, happiness, and freedom…and so much more. You are an inspirtation for all of us. I appreciate the motto you live by- “Be the reason someone smiles today.”
    I believe as we learn our soul growth lessons and change what our definition of love is for us, we can then receive our life partner soul mate. Often it is about what we need to learn to become the person ready and right for our soul mate -aka “the one.”

  12. Sterling x6326

    Peggy (February 23, 2015 at 8:27 pm)

    I am so glad to know you no longer feel pain in regards to this very significant past life connection. I feel you have shared many lifetimes together and the bond is strong.
    It really does help to have contact even while knowing it is not to be.
    Thank you for your response to my article.

  13. Sterling x6326

    Chrissi (February 22, 2015 at 5:49 am)

    Yes, I feel he was your twin flame soul mate who helped you in this life and will be with you again in another. Your connection can not be broken whether either of you are in physcial form or in the spirit world.
    Have you considered writing a book about all you have experienced? You can self publish and sell your book on through
    You have much to share with the world.
    Please call me if I can help you further.

  14. Sterling x6326

    GEMINI6 (February 22, 2015 at 10:29 am)

    My belief is we do have soul mates, all differrent kinds of them.
    Whatever feels right for you to believe is what is right for you.
    Each person has their own beliefs which no one else can dictate for them.
    Through our own, personal beliefs we form our world and life responds to what we believe to be true for ourselves.

  15. Sterling x6326

    david wynant (February 22, 2015 at 6:43 am)

    Just know you are never seperated when one passes on, leaving the physical world. You can also meet another person who is a good match for you, to walk with you in this lifetime, with your former soul mate staying with you as a guide. So many things are possible.

    Blessings, love, and light to you.

  16. Sterling x6326

    Antoinette Atanasoff (February 21, 2015 at 6:05 pm)

    It would not take long for me to look into this for you if you choose to have a brief reading. Otherwise, follow your own intuition and what really feels “best” for you.

  17. Sterling x6326

    Debra Mantini (February 22, 2015 at 6:34 pm)

    My belief is it probably is not. A karmic connection/past life soul mate is there to help you learn soul growth lessons and prepare you to meet your life partner soul mate.
    I’d be happy to look into this further for you if you’d like a reading to clarify anything.

  18. Sterling x6326

    Craig Martin (February 21, 2015 at 4:11 pm)

    I suggest you call for a brief reading to receive an accurate answer.
    All the best to you.

  19. Marc from the UK

    Hello Peggy in the USA what a great article, I am sure you found it hard to write but releasing at the same time. I feel like you do :} you sound like you are reasoning with it all but still sad that you missed that chemistry that may of been the one? or chemistry that was to be a lesson not the reality? Who knows, I visited a place today that I used to meet my lover in secret, it is a place called Gunthorpe, beautiful water setting and it made me sad and happy that I was once in that dream x

  20. Sterling x6326

    Tom (February 22, 2015 at 7:33 am)

    Yes, I agree. Soul mates arrive in many forms- animals, spirit guides, friends, children, etc. There are also many types of soul mates- those who help us through somthing and leave our lives, ones with a message, best friends, karmic, past-life connection, and then of course a life partner soul mate, aka “the one.”
    Almost every call we receive regarding soul mates is about love and relationships and is this “the one?” Most people mix up a strong magnetic connection (usually dramatic) as being their soul mate (the one).
    This is why the articles usually focus on a love relationship soul mate topic.
    Your soul mate comes into your life when the timing is right.
    And a twin flame, when both peiople have completed the necessary soul work – if it is to be in this particular lifetime to be with a twin flame.

  21. Sterling x6326

    Kimberly (February 21, 2015 at 3:51 pm)

    First of all my heart is with you with all you have experienced with the passing of your beloved soul mate.
    Yes, it is possible for you to meet another soul mate to share your life with. It may not be the same type of love affair, however, a wonderful, person you can share life with, love and cherish can come into your life when you are ready.
    Since the love of your life is still spiritually around and watching over you, ask him to help you meet a person he approves of.
    Finding another person will not disturb your connection to him or all that you shared together.
    We also have soulmates in the form of friends, animals, children and spirit guides, etc. We are never alone! Please call me if you’d like more information specifically for you.

  22. Peggy

    This happened exactly, exactly to me, when I was 18. I am now 70. We met, there was a strong chemistry. We parted. I was in heartfelt pain for a long, long time. I married twice, always severed by what I call “the ghost in the closet”. Always the memory returned, always the magnetic draw. Finally when we were 50 I went to find him, to find out who he was. For so long he had been the fantasy in my life. We spent two years visiting back and forth, both still married. Gradually I realized that we were not meant to be together, although when we separated again, the heartfelt pain was still there, and the fantasy. Another twenty years passed. No communication. Last year, 2014, he contacted me to wish me a happy birthday. We emailed back and forth for a year. We are not emailing right now, but one of us will pick it up again. The hurt is no longer there. I am glad to be in touch. That has helped a lot. We are both 70.

  23. Marc from the UK

    I do believe that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. they are there for a reason as we are there for them. I often find the ones that hurt you most are those you needed the most. In learning to be without them you develop and grow. Maybe one day we can sit down and clear the air and reason our behaviours, is that a romantic notion? Learning to understand that forgiveness is far more a positive emotion than anger has helped me to welcome them if ever I saw them again as friends and who knows? Life can be hard, being angry is harder, so hey, lets get happy. I have a sign on my wall that says, BE THE REASON SOMEONE SMILES TODAY !

  24. Debra Mantini

    I’m wondering if your soul mate can also be a past life and/or karmic connection? This was very enlightening. Thanks!

  25. GEMINI6

    Thank you Sterling for your article, it is very informative.
    I myself have had my share of wrong men in my life. Always men who want a meal
    ticket or free ride, and who are in there 50’s and still not stable.
    Right know I have two guys who I have reconnected with, both are good people but, one is
    not stable and we have an understanding that we are just friends. And the other is very
    ambitious man and always improving himself by going to school etc. and does have a stable job. He is a very calm person he states that he has always been like that. I am a Gemini
    and he is a Leo and he is very easy going and I feel comfortable, so were taking it one step at a time. Life is all about learning as u go but, with so many disappointments it is a challenge. By the way is there such thing as soul mates? On my travels and readings that I have read they have said no. I am confused.

  26. Tom

    Seems every article about soul mates is about your soul mate being your lover/husband-wife. What about the times soul mates come together as siblings or parent/child or just your best friend ever. Soul mates does not have much to do with the physical, mostly things of a spiritual nature and helping the soul to grow. As such we shouldn’t focus our search on finding our soul mate as a lover, sometimes our soul mate doesn’t come into our life till we need them, which may be years into this lifetime. So we should look for a mate one that will help us grow and share this life together. Our soul mate will show up when we are ready and need them.
    Blessed Be

  27. david wynant

    2011 I lost a friend to limgirdle musceldysophre he was only 46 we met 20 years earlier to the month that we David WynanI always felt I love him evenbefore I met him now I pray for him everyday and miss him so much I feel that he was intended to be in my lifebut sadly taken away to soon now Iam very lonely and sad hping that when I die I will see him again I don’t feel that I ever will have a good friend like him again in my life He was one of a kind I miss him thanksfor listening David Wynant

  28. Chrissi

    Had that with my first love- but, once his family discovered us they married him to someone from India- he had no choice in the matter as they married them by proxy- in those days that happened to Asian guys who took up with white girls unfortunately and they moved the family away too that led to much heartache for the both of us my first marriage failed and my second has come very close on a few occasions as well though at least in this marriage we are both friends – the physical side died fairly recently- well in the last fifteen years for me but I was fairly good at faking it – but we carry on been married 24 years this year and I still miss my first love- if it wasn’t for him I’d still be in an abusive relationship as well as he gave me the courage to leave even though I lost my home and everything in it I couldn’t carry out myself because he told me my life was more important than ‘things’ as I’d been trying to save my home- been told even to his dying day he still loved me sad, but hoping in our next life we will be able to be together

  29. aparna

    Big big thank you I am experiencing exact situation and these blogs are perfect guides for me. in ancient times we heard Word AKASHWANI. just that i am recieving signals from HEAVEN through you. i am grateful to GOD for sending divine help from YOU

  30. aparna

    Big big thank you I am experiencing exact situation and these blogs are perfect guides for me. in ancient times we heard Word AKASHWANI. just that i am recieving signals from HEAVEN through you. i am grateful to GOD for sending divine help from YOU

  31. Antoinette Atanasoff

    Sterling, your comments on relationships helpful I have had 2 readings each quite different from the other. I don’t know if I can afford another reading now. I do need a definite reading/answer about someone. Need to think.

  32. irene

    this is fascinating ,very interesting ,i do believe we have soul mates,it’s to able to know when you have actual met them or meet them ?

  33. Craig Martin

    There is a lady named Kwesi Slaw. I am corresponding with her on the internet. She is the most wonderful lady I ever met. Should I continue the relationship

  34. Gayle

    Interesting article, as I’m recovering from one of those “drama-simulated chemistry” relationships, with someone everyone thought would marry me, and I’m slowly getting to know someone else who is still a friend at this point, but there is a, “subtle, comfortable, stable feeling connection,” with him. Interestingly enough, this man is a friend of “Mr. Drama,” and I met him through my last boyfriend. As one of my CA Psychics tells me, sometimes people come into out lives as catalysts so we can meet the people we are supposed to meet.

    I’m not entirely sure about past lives, but I still found the article interesting and enlightening. Thank you for sharing it.

  35. Monique

    Thank you for sharing this. I do not ever reply/comment on such pieces often AT ALL; I couldn’t help myself this time however.

    That blasted “past life/karmic, energetic connection” with “him”. I sincerely identify with the definition thereof AND it’s description….UNHEALTHY!

    Thankful that I no longer desire to be with this man (which took a ridiculous amount of time…a year of getting over it/past it/removal of “it”; “it” was 9.5 years! Understanding the significance in numbers, I refused to make it 10 years!

    Nonetheless, as much as I love “love”, I am soooo not looking for anyone right now (not even the gentleman who showed up…and nope, he’s not a soulmate, but the residue of that previous, familiar karmic energy…won’t fool me this time!!!).

    This was a great read.

  36. Kimberly

    Is it possible to find two soulmates? I already found my soulmate back in 1996, we got married in 1999 April 24. He was truly the love of my life, and I his. we had a wonderful connection and a beautiful relationship, I recently lost him on July 26, 2014. he passed away from cancer and several other health issues. I am lost without him, even though I know he is with me and always watching over me! I just wander around trying to occupy my time,I miss him so very much every day its just unimagineable!! I am trying to heal little by little, but it is so hard! Will I ever meet anybody again that could ever fill this hole in my heart? I am a very caring person and have alot to offer, we never had any children of our own, but he did have a son who I love and think the world of, along with 2 boys my step grandchildren, I love them all, they have played a big part in my healing! I dont know if it will ever be possible to find that special kind of bond with anyone else ever again! this coming April 24, would of been our 16th anni


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