Time to Take a Leap of Faith

As 2010 began, I didn’t feel this magical weight lifting off my shoulders. I still felt 2009, 2008, heck a bunch of years still filling me with angst. Where had the time gone? Why did I still feel like I was spinning my wheels and going no where?

Most people were starting the year with such positive energy and resolutions and I found myself sinking into a depression. I decided to call Kyra ext. 5215 because I definitely needed to come out of my dark cave. Within a couple of minutes, I realized what my biggest problem was in my career and my relationship…fear.

I am in a good relationship that started out rocky but has since turned into a solid loving relationship. My problem is I was still holding on to the old hurt and as Kyra said “being fiercely independent with trust issues.” Yep, that’s me. Of course, I want to be in this relationship but maybe because I know how to be alone, I end up hesitating and not fully relaxing into my love life. These insecurities were eating me alive.

We’re all susceptible to insecurity and not only was it affecting my relationship, but my career as well. As Kyra put it, I’m not where I’m meant to be and no matter what I do, I won’t be happy till I take that leap of faith. She wasn’t suggesting I turn to unemployment. Kyra was recommending having the confidence to pursue my dreams and taking all the necessary steps to do so.

I have been taking steps but depression will certainly knock the inspiration and motivation out of anyone. A short talk with Kyra and I felt emboldened to go after my dreams. The thing is, pursuing an artistic career is never easy especially when you’re working other jobs. There is no set path or formula to success. Sort of like a relationship. I mean no two people I know have landed in love the same exact way.

I don’t need to waste more time wondering where the years have gone. I need to focus on the present moment. Kyra confirmed my boyfriend wanted things to work and that if I started more aggressively pursuing my career, the ball would begin to roll. Her words “take a leap of faith” really stuck with me. We can’t worry our way to love or success. We can have faith and do the work it takes for work or love.

Do you find yourself struggling with insecurities? Do you end up self-sabotaging love or career? I feel this is something many people struggle with but don’t really want to admit.

7 thoughts on “Time to Take a Leap of Faith

  1. Jim

    I have read the , very well written article and all the comments.Frankly they all have very well thought out and good points, spiritualy, psychologically, with regard to the past, present and future.But, what happens when you have lept before and gotten the same results with regard to trust,Love,and been told “It will be different this time if only you give me another chance to “PROVE MY LOVE TO YOU AND EARN YOUR TRUST BACK”.. Time and time again you want to believe that person can change ,and take that leap of faith again, and more importantly, wants to change and or improve themselves first and foremost because without the change/improvement in their own personal lives and CHARACTER, there is no Loving, Trusting Relationship with us. I’m where I want to be in my life with regard to character, integrity,morals, ethics,standards,spirituality,
    and FAMILY values that I do NOT feel I should have to compromise on just to meet someone elses standards. Although at their core and beliefs , THEY ARE A GOOD PERSON AND KNOW RIGHT FROM WRONG, and GOOD FROM BAD DECISIONS,and I truly feel and Know that this person STILL does Love me, BUT “CHOSE POORLY” and chose the easier path again and again with regard to the friends who are enablers and continue to allow their FRIEND down a path of self-destruction which I was lied to about as well. How , as a HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS , do you believe in that person again or for that matter any person after taking that leap on more than one occasion? Especially after the lies,that came after asking for forgiveness, then more lies, then saying it wont happen again and it does, then wanting to make plans to get married and start a Family.. BTW- If you are reading this, it doesn’t just happen to woman. My name is Jim and I’m a Man still in Love with my Ex with whom I took the LEAP of LOVE and trusted with my heart NOT with only with my MIND.I gave her the benefit of the doubt many times and enough emotional rope she hanged BOTH of us with it. She also knows she has done too much damage to our foundation, or lack there of, that she cannot come back AND BURNED HER BRIDGE because she knows I’m a Man who she said looked up to and respected because of who I’am. When the question arose whether something or someone was morally correct, she always knew my barometer was morally correct and I would give her a straight answer IN MY OPINION,only when asked AND be honest with her and say the truth. Its very easy to say “Life goes on” and it does, but the quality of LIFE has been decreased because of the TRUST THAT WAS BROKEN. In my opinion , the leap of faith will come to every individual in their own time after the hurt has gone and the healing and trust has begun

    Reply
  2. angela cameron

    I too can empathize with your situation as I have felt the same way many times throughout my life. I however, have learned that even though we may fear the unknown still we have to try. Life goes on right?

    Reply
  3. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi Sharen…
    So true….having faith in yourself, and having the courage to go on, truly
    is ultimate “the leap of faith”.
    We learn and grow by making mistakes….sometimes that learning process is difficult and painful when we fall on our ” knees”.
    We are all a ” spiritual work in process”, so to speak….LOL.
    But REAL Karmic growth is about picking one’s self up off the ground,dusting yourself off, and going onward…. and trying not to make THAT type of particular mistake again.
    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply
  4. sharen hill

    I think it is a natural thing to hold onto the pain as it is always fresh in your mind, and the fear is very great and very real, how do you get past that, perhaps the leap of faith and that means being vunerable again..and that truly is the “leap”
    share

    Reply
  5. JoPhine

    Its so hard to forget things out when it had hurt you a lot. And so hard to bring back the faith and trust to someone who once became unfaithful to your relationship. Trust is one of the foundation of Love when its gone, LOVE goes too. . .

    Reply
  6. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Well…..I’ve always said that if you live in the moment, and walk your own Karmic path…everything else, including love, will fall into place. It’s all about having and maintaining a healthy, balanced approach in your own, individual life.
    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply
  7. Heidi Kentwood

    This is so personal, well written, and heartfelt. I agonize over the same issues – especially in love. You feel being alone is easier than trusting the unknown. I hold onto past hurts, too. Past pain. But I try not to let it interfere with the path ahead. It’s as bright as I ALLOW it to be:)

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