3 Things to Know About Your Partner Before You Get Married

Your Partner Before You Get Married

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If you’re getting hitched, exchanging vows, tying the knot or jumping the broom, you’re probably filled with exuberance and excitement and dreaming of the day you say I do. But in all the anticipation of your upcoming nuptials you may have overlooked a few important details.

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Do You Want to Live Happily Ever After or in Oblivion? 

Think for a minute or two about the vows you’re taking. Whether you write your own or stick to the tried and true verses, a promise of fidelity should be taken seriously. So it’s good to know who you’re marrying before you marry them and it’s good to know that you two are on the same page about several important things that could be a part of your married life. Here are my top three.

1. Do They Want to Have Children?
Where do you and your partner stand on having children? Do you both want them or not? If you want them, how many? Would you consider adoption? No matter how you feel, the answer should be definitive—yes or no; not maybe. This question is important because it involves bringing someone else into the picture who doesn’t get to choose you, like you and your partner chose each other. And it’s true that having a child will change both of your lives in many ways and forever, whether you stay together or not.

2. Do They Manage Their Finances Well?
How is your partner with finances? Does your partner have debt? Do they have good credit and do you know their credit score? Will you buy a house together once you’re married? You want to know that you’re marrying someone who is responsible with money. This doesn’t mean they have to be rich, but it does mean that they shouldn’t expect you to live in a box under a bridge if they decide to suddenly quit their job before getting a new one either.

3. What’s Their Romantic History?
If this is the first marriage for both of you, chances are you don’t have to deal with an ex. But what if your fiance was married before? What if they have kids with their ex? Do they pay alimony or child support? Are they still in contact with any of their exes? Were the splits amicable, or are there bad feelings between them? If children or exes will be a part of your married life, it’s best to know that ahead of time. Hopefully you’ll have already established boundaries and a good relationship with these people before you get married.

Always Ask the Hard Questions

Don’t shy away from asking questions—even the hard questions. Love alone will not save your relationship if your views and goals are vastly different. Remember, a few uncomfortable conversations now beat a lifetime of regret (or a divorce) any day. If you’re getting married, no conversation should be off limits—especially if your future happiness depends on it. Marriage is meant to last a lifetime, so it shouldn’t be taken lightly.

2 thoughts on “3 Things to Know About Your Partner Before You Get Married

  1. Daphne

    These are indeed important topics to cover before gettin hitched! As my callers know, I’m a big proponent of having hard conversations-because no matter how many readings you get on how your sweetie feels on x, y or z, nothing replaces good old fashioned communication! It’s important to be able to have fun, enjoy each other and be able to talk about everything under the sun ❤️ Being on the same page on the big stuff, helps you navigate the little stuff more easily as well! To your marital happiness, with love! Xoxo Psychic Daphne

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  2. Josephine Martinez

    Does my husband izzy really love me. It’s been 37 yrs. Fb differences. Can fb women interest him such as puctures.

    Reply

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