Anne from Vancouver, BC asks:
Hi, Red. I’m at a crossroads. I’m Canadian, but was based in Australia for about eighteen years. In 2007, I got a contract as an event planner in Vancouver that would last until the end of 2010. I was very unhappy in this position. After trying to make it work, I resigned in July 2009. At the time, I thought I’d spend the summer in Vancouver, and return to Australia before winter. However, my father passed away two days before my last day at work. So, I went to Montreal (where my family lives), and spent about three weeks there. I decided to stay a bit longer in Canada as things with my father’s estate were taking much longer to resolve.
In that time, I met someone – Ben – and we started seeing each other. I had my doubts from the start, and kept pushing him away – yet he remained, and doesn’t seem deterred. I tried helping with my father’s estate, but met resistance. With the summer over, I’m thinking of going back to Australia. I’m still uncertain of where to go to and call home. Ben wants to come with me, and I’ve voiced my concerns about him leaving his life to be with me. What if it doesn’t work out? He’s asked me to sponsor him on a fiancé visa.
I haven’t worked in over a year. I’m considering a career change to find something more fulfilling. I’m not sure what that is. Do you have any insights? Which way should I go?
Psychic Red ext. 9226 Responds:
It looks as if it’s going to take you a bit of time before you decide where it is that you want to call home. While it does appear as if Australia is more agreeable to you, and you would have more professional options and opportunities in that locale, you aren’t appearing as quite ready to make that move. Unless you decide to focus more intently on that transition, it looks as if your relocation is going to be postponed until June or July of next year.
As far as your career goes, you’re good in your current profession. While your last contract wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be, the field itself still shines brightly around you. So, keep your mind open to it as an option, but I also want to encourage you to consider other avenues. You’re very gifted when it comes to working with people and helping them to realize their fullest potential. Your independent nature and ability to organize and prioritize is also quite natural, and should be a consideration with any career or business prospect. Because of your experience and creativity, starting your own, successful business keeps showing up in the cards, and is ultimately the path you will follow. While there may be a contract or job between now and then, you’ll eventually decide to work for yourself, utilizing the points I’ve already mentioned. I’m not quite sure how it will all come together for you, or what you actually call a business that encompasses party planning, business planning, counseling, fundraising, motivational venues, and a touch of art – but it’s the business you create. It will give you the personal fulfillment, human interaction, freedom, and financial rewards you seek. All I can really tell you is to think on it, because this is something that comes from within you.
As for Ben, I would be hesitant to assist him with a fiancé visa, because ultimately he isn’t the man you will spend your life with. Even though you’re fond of him, and he certainly wants a future with you, there is another who will come along and steal your heart. You won’t be meeting that man for several more years, so there is no reason for you to break away from your current boyfriend at this time, but the relationship will fade. If you choose to sponsor him, you’ll feel responsible for him, and that obligation would be draining. Continue to be as honest with him as you can about your feelings and concerns, but understand that this relationship is not at a point or a level of strength where you should go against your instincts. Doing so would only cause you regret. After you relocate, he will come to visit, but I really don’t see him making this a permanent relocation.
I can see that you’ve been doing a lot of thinking and soul-searching, and that’s good. However, you need to free yourself from the concept that there is something missing. That belief is showing up loud and clear, and it’s creating a level of disruption and presents as an internal block. Just let yourself be, and listen to your inner voice. It’s trying to tell you what you need, but your sense of logic and fear of bad choices or wrong decisions is keeping you still. Permit yourself to go with the flow, and the answers will come. Happiness and success is in front of you, largely because you create it.
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